Category Archives: mental illness

50 Years of Running: Chasing career options

By the time I’d turned 27 years old, the decision to stop racing and training so hard was well-established in my mind. With a child to raise and a wife to please, I focused on work-life as the central priority. … Continue reading

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50 Years of Running: Competition’s Son, Part 3

The advent of DNA genealogy and its revelations make it practical these days to understand family history even to the point of health risks and almost pinpoint accuracy about ethnic origins. While those scientific tools are helpful, they never tell … Continue reading

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50 Years of Running: Competition’s Son, Part 2

The town of Seneca Falls, New York, is well-known as the cinematic source for the town of Bedford Falls as depicted in the movie “It’s a Wonderful Life.” Even at the age of 60+ years old, I can well recall … Continue reading

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50 Years of Running: The Fuse

And the years that I spent lost in the mysteryFall away leaving only the sound of the drumLike a part of meIt speaks to the heart of meForget what life used to beYou are what you choose to beIt’s whatever … Continue reading

Posted in 10K, aging, aging is not for the weak of heart, anxiety, Christopher Cudworth, college, competition, cross country, mental health, mental illness | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

50 Years of Running: Exhaust fumes and lane changes

By November of 1984, I’d raced enough that by the 17th of November when I ran a 20:17 four-mile… that should have been enough to call it quits. But then my former coach and then-business associate Trent Richards got involved … Continue reading

Posted in 10K, 13.1, 400 meter intervals, 5K, anxiety, Christopher Cudworth, cross country, mental health, mental illness, race pace, racing peak, track and field | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

50 Years of Running: Tears for Fears

All around me are familiar facesWorn out places, worn out facesBright and early for the daily racesGoing nowhere, going nowhere Lyrics to Mad World by Tears for Fears, later recorded by Gary Jules As I continued working hopefully for Trent … Continue reading

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50 Years of Running: The Rain King gets no satisfaction

On March 20, 1984, the vernal equinox arrived with typically chilly March weather. But like a maple tree with its sap starting to run, I was eager to start using the fitness I’d built over the winter. After the freezing … Continue reading

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50 Years of Running: The singular nature of a double life

In late October of 1983, with the racing season nearing its end, I was still attending workouts with the Tom Brunick crew at both University of Illinois-Chicago as well as the odd little cinder track at Northwestern in the upper … Continue reading

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50 Years of Running: Jacked around

Having moved everything I owned east to Philly the previous August, now I was faced with hauling everything back to Chicago the following May. Through a few quick conversations with a close friend living on the north side of the … Continue reading

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50 Years of Running: Marching on

By March 6, 1983, the weather in southeastern Pennsylvania was beginning to moderate. I ran a sixteen-miler in 1:43 on a route that I now knew well enough to do with confidence. No more getting lost in horse country. I … Continue reading

Posted in blood on the highway, Christopher Cudworth, competition, death, fear, mental health, mental illness, race pace, racing peak, running, running shoes, sex, we run and ride | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment