Abiding with the seasons

Birding Black and White.jpgThis time of year, the day after Halloween, things seem to happen fast.

Weatherman Tom Skilling of the Chicago Tribune this morning notes that November is the fastest chilling month of the year.

Those of us who run and ride certainly know the outline of that story.

Here in Illinois, we’ve had a few straight days of weather above sixty-five degrees.

It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking that type of weather will hold out forever.

Most of us who run and ride have learned our lesson by now. November is the most fickle month of all. I well recall a November day twenty years or so ago that dropped below zero degrees Fahrenheit. To go from forty degree days to a sudden shot of cold like that is shocking. However, the temps have been moderating the last few years thanks to climate change. A mild winter is predicted here.

Sandhills Sunset.pngI have another measure of the changing seasons that I always trust. That is the migration of birds. Typically in our area of the country, the first and second week of November brings cool north to northwestern winds. That’s when sandhill cranes come thick and fast. They’re headed southeast to Florida for the most part.

We have cranes now breeding here in Illinois as well. They’ve become quite common, even to the point of lurking around suburban yards as if human beings don’t even exist. That’s a big change from even twenty years ago when the local population of breeding cranes was sparse and skittish. Now they couldn’t give a rat’s ass about human beings as long as one does not approach them directly. They even walked up to our bird feeders from our backyard several times this year.

Junco.pngThe bird feeder is where one can most easily see the change of the seasons. The dark-eyed juncos have arrived along with the fall sparrows. They inhabit the feeder zone in rotating shifts it seems as each morning progresses. The sparrows might start, but then the blackbirds and grackles arrive and chase them out. When those leave the juncos swing into action.

But there are also progressions of birds that arrive and depart with the passing seasons. These mark the typically slow progression of fall into winter, or winter into spring. I welcome it all. Because what else can you do?

IMG_6701.JPGThese have been the measures of the seasons for me for more than five decades. I’m still running like I did in the early 70s, and I still get out birding now and then. Or else I’m taking photographs of birds because that’s a satisfying way to capture those experiences.

I don’t suppose these rhythms will ever change much, or at least I hope not.  We all need foundations for belief and interest. These also keep the seasons from running into each other without notice or observation. The world wants to be noticed and engaged. It is only ours to oblige, and abide.

 

 

Posted in running, we run and ride, We Run and Ride Every Day, werunandride | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

On the prowl, and what do you abide?

Bat from swimmingThere have been times in my life when I’ve blamed myself for not taking enough initiative. That was particularly true back when I was dating in my teens and early 20s. My foibles with women were as comic as any Rom-Com romance flick.

It didn’t exactly help that I was virtually a human scarecrow at the time. I stood 6′ 1.5″ and weighed 140 lbs. Not exactly the physique to which many women are attracted. At least not women in bars. That’s where much of the so-called “dating” scene took place once one got into college.

Teen years, lean years

Those teen years were not all lean years for me when it came to dating. But not growing up with sisters did hamper my ability to understand women from the perspective that they had insecurities and problems just like me. I saw them all as near-perfect creatures who knew so much more about the world than did I.

Then at reunions and such I’d find out that ‘this girl’ or ‘that girl’ actually liked me for some period during high school. They were often girls that I dearly would have liked to date. But when you miss those signals through the fog of your own delusions, girls don’t wait around. They look for someone more astute and receptive.

I also learned that a particularly quiet girl purposely worked at the long jump pit during track meets because she liked the view of men’s legs and could see up their shorts. And in college I was standing at the jukebox one night when some plain yet mysterious woman slipped her hand along the machine to graze my crotch. What guy would not know those direct shows of interest?

Initiative, dude. Show some.

Getting woke

Ultimately I woke up a little. Which is how I came to follow a sleek female form running up the lakefront in Chicago. When I caught up, I asked her for a date and she said “Sure.” So we met for drinks and went dancing on Rush Street. It turned out she knew every bouncer on the strip. She was, as they say, “Out of my league.” But she was a dancer with a nice butt who wore a shirt that showed off her amazing abs, which she flexed for me.  She was ahead of her time in that regard, for sure.

Runner girl

But that urgent date didn’t lead to anything. At least I’d worked up the courage to try. Then I noticed another fine female form at a track practice held each week at the downtown Northwestern campus. She was an excellent runner, turning out 400 meter intervals at 6:00 mile pace. I was 24 years old and fit as heck at the peak of my running career. So I trailed her around practice and plotted ways to cross paths with her when it the track session over. I was on the prowl.

We talked a little about her running, and then I asked her to give me a ride home. Never mind that my own car was parked about three vehicles back from hers. I was on the prowl. My white lie ploy worked.

She drove me home in her Subaru. From that point on we were dating. Now grant you, I had a girlfriend living out in the suburbs at the time. In fact, she was the woman I would one day marry. So this is a confession that I was not entirely ethical in my pursuits. I was living in the City of Chicago with a best friend and we were rousting about having fun like twenty-somethings do, and probably should.

Break a leg girl

The relationship with that runner girl lasted several months. As we trained together I noticed one day that she was limping. Upon asking her why, I learned she had pain below her knee. I set her up with a doctor I knew and the sore lower knee turned out to be a stress fracture. I advised that she should quit running and let it heal. But she was a determined young woman who loved to run, and one day at the track she was completing an interval when we all heard an audible “crack!” It was the bone in her leg breaking. For sure. Ouch.

Dude AbidesSo she was an intense character, that runner girl, with one brown eye and one blue. I always thought she was a bit binary in some respects. And I’m not sure she was entirely faithful to me, as she had quite a bit of drive in appetites and the means to indulge them. She made $90K a year back then.

So it was one of those urban balancing acts in which two people swirl around each other like satellites sending signals that aren’t entirely clear. But I’ll raise one to her. She abided me for a while.

Busted

Then one Saturday morning, my girlfriend from the suburbs was heading into the city to meet up with me for a weekend. Admittedly, I’d been out dancing with the downtown woman late that Friday night. So I was still feeling a bit hazy when I pulled up to the train station. To cover my tracks the night before, I’d told my suburban girlfriend that I was going out that evening with a guy named Larry. I don’t know why I chose him. I just did.

When my suburban girlfriend climbed into the car she immediately asked, “How was your night out with Larry?”

I started to tell her some tale about going out to the bars with Larry, and such and she said, “That’s funny. I rode the train in with Larry this morning.”

Busted.

Breaking point

Chris Running 1978From that point forward I broke off the downtown relationship and turned full attention to the woman that I’d marry a year later. But when I told the downtown sweetheart (and she was at that) we were breaking it off, she literally punched me in the arm as I confessed that I had another girlfriend. “I knew it,” she hissed.

It actually broke my heart to lose the relationship with her. Back then I abided in the belief that it was entirely possible to be in love with two people at once. It’s especially true when living in separate worlds. Perhaps there’s a time and a place for that.

And then there are situations when the purity of the moment is made from the absence of time (Ambiguous Adventure).

I was once visited by a former co-worker with whom I’d been quite close. We never dated because she had a full-time boyfriend. But when I was living alone in the Philadelphia area she arrived on business and we consummated our friendship after a night consuming Rolling Rocks. Because that’s what real friends do? Not exactly. But I loved her, and I know that she loved me. And that was that.

Life goes on

AS life goes on, the foundations of relationship evolve. And I do abide in the fact that once the real commitment is made to the person you love, those “on the prowl” instincts should be directed solely at person you love. That’s how I live my life and always will.

Yet I’ve encountered so many people over the years that have not abided that, and the costs are typically dear. There are also people I have known, or read about, who absolutely choose to flaunt their “on the prowl” instincts as a sign of their worldly prowess.

Those of us that learned the difference, through experience, between casual and real commitment find it hard to respect those whose extra-marital dalliances dominate their worldview, and who thumb their nose at the social contracts the rest of us do abide. Unfortunately the people with the most “drive” in life often can’t seem to stay (or play) between the lines.

The lists are long, and filled with characters both admirable and sordid. They include the likes of JFK..and Franklin Roosevelt. But also… Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. and Bill Clinton. Then there are the New Age cheaters and misogynists, the brutes and harassers ranging from Harvey Weinstein to Bill O’Reilly. From Anthony Weiner to Donald Trump. And of course there is a whole host of others in between. All cheaters and flaunters. Mostly men.

The measure

Does it kill the quality of their contributions to the world if they screwed around, and did not abide in fidelity? Well, that depends. The real question there is simple: Who have they harmed along the way? And are they still harming people to this day, and willingly? In that we should not abide.

We’ll always have powerful politicians and religious leaders and others who screw around and think they’ll never get caught. It’s the ones who do, and don’t even care, or those who do, and refuse to admit it that are a danger to society. It’s even worse when institutions or political parties turn their cheeks in the name of maintaining power.

In those people, even Jesus did not abide.

Making choices

IMG_8190The bulk of us aren’t naive to the fact that people make romantic, sexual and emotional choices that don’t always fit between the white lines on the road map of love. Affairs are the tarsnakes of the heart, and darkness sometimes rules those souls.

It’s the people who claim to be better than the rest of us, or who espouse high character only to be exposed as frauds that are the real shams in this world. In those people I will never choose to abide. In fact, I’ll gladly resist them on all fronts, because they have refused to acknowledge the realities of their deceptions. We all face crossroads in life. Some take the low road yet claim it as a sign of virtuous character and bold nature.

But many of us know better, and have abided the differences as sound choices in life, and are better for it.

 

 

Posted in 400 meter intervals, 400 workouts, Christopher Cudworth, Tarsnakes, triathlete, triathlon, triathlons, we run and ride | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

“I’m a creature of habit. I just have too many habits.”

IMG_0389I texted the title of this blog to my wife this morning. It stemmed from the discovery of my main set of car keys in the pocket of a jacket I’d hung on the rack in the front room. I was a teeny bit concerned that I’d taken that set of keys with me on the trip to Iowa this weekend, then lost them somehow.

However I recalled that I’d specifically NOT brought those keys with me to avoid just such a problem. Having lost a set of keys (or two) in the past, I’ve developed habits that help prevent that from occurring. Thus I consciously avoided losing the main set of keys and all my fitness club passes by leaving them at home.

But I also recall using them to move vehicles the morning of my departure. So I must have tossed them in that coat pocket and left that jacket at home. This morning I gratefully felt the weight of those keys in one of the pockets as I pulled on that jacket.

Stuff

IMG_5697When you’re an active person, especially a triathlete, it seems have your life is spent gathering stuff for the next training session or event. Just a swim practice alone can call for a bag of swimming implements; float, fins and board. Then there are goggles, anti-fog juice, swimsuit and a towel to remember. There’s also soap to get the chlorine smell off your body, and deodorant when the workout’s all done.

To get ready for swimming, I’ve developed a few habits to keep things organized. Nothing takes the will out of you like having to track down gear at 5:00 am.

Bike Racing 3Cycling’s a total pain when it comes to the amount of gear needed to hit the road. Helmet, sunglasses, shoes, Garmin, lights, bottles, nutrition and phones are on the short list of necessities it seems. Before all that one needs to choose the right clothing, which depends entirely on the weather, the wind, precipitation or sun.

No two rides are ever the same, but it certainly helps to have developed a few habits to organize the gear into general categories so that the assembly can take place. Cyclists go into action much like the comic book character Ironman. If only the gear would fly onto our bodies like his armored suit.

Of course there is also the bike itself to prepare, and the habits to make that a safe deal include checking the tires for proper inflation, oiling the chain and making sure there’s a spare tube (or two) in the kit just in case there’s a flat along the way. And don’t forget the CO2 and the implement to fill the tire. Sheez. 

Even with all that preparation, things can still go wrong on the bike that no habit can prevent. I once felt a pedal come unscrewed on my cleat because the mechanic that worked on my bike the day before did not complete the work properly. That’s a weird sensation, losing a pedal. Fortunately, some rider in our group actually carried a pedal wrench with him. Talk about luck.

Running

Coming aliveWell, there’s one more sport to consider before we’re done discussing the importance of habits and preparation. That’s the sport of running. Supposed to be simple, right? A pair of running shoes and shorts and off you go!

Not so fast.

I’ve been a runner for close to fifty years, and over that time running seems to have gotten a bit more complicated than it once was. We didn’t have much in the way of gear forty years ago. Running watches were in the early stages of development, with Casio and Timex leading the way. Having a digital watch was a cool deal back when there weren’t always splits read during races.

We sure didn’t have sunglasses either. Now there are brands specifically designed to suit runners, such as Goodr, that are both cool-looking and functional. Back in the mid-80s I got myself a pair of those huge Oakley’s that triathletes and cyclists were wearing. I ran a few races in them and frankly looked like some sort of reject from the movie Starship Troopers.

As for footwear, I’ve been through so many pairs of running shoes and styles and models it’s impossible to count. I have about ten pairs literally kicking around my bedroom. These include three pairs of New Balance. Two are for running, one just for show.

There are a couple/few pairs of Saucony Triumph ISOs too. A set of Newtons. One lone pair of bright red Nike shoes that I’ve only worn running once, and got a calf cramp. So they’re just for show too.

These shoes all rotate in and out from under the bed depending on what habit I’m trying to assuage. For casual or running? My wife thinks this is nuts, storing shoes under the bed. It’s an old habit, I guess.

More habits than sense

Cud with Maravich skillsAdd in all the other things I do in life and the number of habits required to keep things in order nearly spins out of control.

My artwork and studio always require organization. During the creative process, I tend to scatter jars of paint and brushes and reference sources all over the room. Then there’s the hauling materials and paintings around. Schlepping. I hate that part of being an artist.

I’m no pro photographer, but any photography fan can tell you that organizing your gear is everything.

The same goes for birding, another hobby that requires habits to keep track of binoculars and scope. The list goes on and on of things that require habits to keep track and find when you need them.

Multiple interests

Now, I’m not complaining. Exactly. I like having multiple interests. I get bored otherwise. Too easily. That’s why I suffered in school. Could not muster the energy to pay attention when stimulation was lacking. So I drew. All over my papers. It was redirected aggression and a reflection of my own anxiety and creative tension.

Please, just don’t let me be bored. 

It’s one of the tarsnakes of existence that to lead an interesting life you have to focus so much on keeping your shit together.

Mean Machine.jpgIt all reminds me of one of my favorite lines from the movies The Longest Yard starring Burt Reynolds, the 1970s version. Somewhere early in the plot line, he pauses to reflect on his wayward life and remarks:

“I’ve had my shit together a long time. It just doesn’t fit in one bucket.” 

Well, you can rest in peace now Burt, along with all your characters. The only habit the dead need to keep in mind is lying perfectly still. That actually sounds inviting in some ways.

But the long nap can wait. I’ve got habits to maintain in the meantime.

Got a fave habit you can share?  cudworthfix@gmail.com or in the comment section below

Posted in Christopher Cudworth, cycling, running, swimming | Tagged , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Rock solid values, allowing for sandstone

IMG_0219.jpgThis weekend I drove up to Decorah, Iowa to visit friends and conduct some business on art and writing with former professors at Luther College. The weather was pleasantly gray in that Decorah way, often threatening rain. That only gave the wonderful bluffs of the Upper Iowa river valley a craggy cast, which I love.

Saturday morning, I ran with a former teammate through some pine and cedar woods. As we trod quietly on pine needle paths, he recalled some stories of our competitive past that I had not heard before. When he and my freshman year roommate were leading the conference meet our junior year, they’d broken free by twenty yards when one turned to the other and said, “Kinda crowded.”

“Let’s go at the next turn,” came the reply.

They went on to finish hand in hand for a first place win.

Road Trip

IMG_0278.jpgAfter the morning run I drove into the hills north of Decorah to take reference photos for a new round of paintings. This year I produced an art exhibition titled Road Trip that celebrates the collected memories gained from going on a road trip. I know the roads around Decorah pretty well from having run  on them for so many miles and so many years. But for new content I trusted a phone app to show me new roads, and I wandered afield with no plan and camera in hand.

The topography of Decorah is part of the area they call the Driftless Region. The glaciers that flattened much of the upper Midwest never reached the swath of southwest Wisconsin and Northeast Iowa. That means there are still tall chimney bluffs of well-layered limestone, but evidence of that oceanic origin seems to spill from every hillside.

In the current era, the Upper Iowa River curls and turns through this landscape, a treat for paddlers of many kinds. But this was a big water year and several paddlers had to be pulled from the river when underwater snags caught their craft. One kayaker met her death when the river caught her craft and trapped her upside down.

The old metal bridges that still connect the roads across the Upper Iowa are being replaced, one by one, as they age beyond their useful years. The structures that remain take on elegaic stature as they reach from white road to white road in the back country.

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Whispering hills

There’s always been a haunting quality to the place in all the years I’ve known it. It’s like the hills want to whisper something to you about your own mortality. I felt it even as a young man. When the drumming of ruffed grouse echoed off the hillsides in spring, it always felt like it was coming from inside your own head.

These days one is more likely to find wild turkey than grouse in the woods. I’d photographed a pair just east of Prairie du Chien, Wisconsin on my way north. They are eternal-looking beasts and evolutionary evidence that dinosaurs never completely died out.

Wild Turks.jpgOn the way back home Sunday morning, I left early when a spitting rainstorm was locked over the Mississippi Valley. The roads were shiny and the skies took forever to lighten. As the road turned south from Effigy Mounds National Monument, I stopped the car to pick up two giant chunks of sandstone that had fallen off the face of the bluffs lining the west side of the road. I’d seen them on my way up to Decorah and vowed to stop and pick them up on the way home.

But I know that they don’t hold up forever under the force of rain and heat when left out in the elements. I’d picked up a large chunk before and brought it home to my woodland garden where it proceeded to split and disassemble. Sandstone is not as durable as limestone, which comprises so much of the bedrock of the Midwest. But I still love the stuff just as I love to look at the layers of those chimney bluffs in Decorah. All those layers of sediment laid down by ancient seas were carved away as the oceans receded. Now they stand as a testament to time and the changing face of the earth.

Flood of lies

Some like to claim all that limestone and sandstone was laid down by the ancient flood recorded in the Bible. Those claims are an ardent and long-term struggle to control knowledge about the world and confine it to a manageable, preferably creationist ideology. But the earth knows better. It cares not whether someone projects brevity and sudden calamity on its surface. The earth is both patient and brutally wise about its origins, and it never, ever quits. We see evidence of the processes that drive all this from plate tectonics to volcanism. We brand the seemingly fix facets of the earth’s structure geology, but that’s even a limiting term. The earth is both continually creative and dismissive, even consuming itself as ocean floor subducts into magma. The earth is beset by its own elements and also adrift in the vastness of space, which cares not whether it exists.

Religious zealots with a literal take on the Bible seek to explain away earth’s evolving predicament by granting it special status amongst the billions of stars and planets. I don’t feel the need for such reductionism. The God exists in the realm of love, and that brings it all home for me.

Crags and features

IMG_9909.jpgYet it feels somehow significant to stand in the murk of dawn at the base of a massive cliff towering hundreds of feet over your head. After forty years I’ll admit that I echo its craggy features in my own aging face. I have driven past those limestone bluffs in various states of confidence or anxiety all those years. I have also climbed on top of those hills trying to find significance in the valleys below. Such are the heights and depths of our years.

Ups and downs

IMG_9908.JPGYet these cycles, for all their ups and downs, have also always made me feel real and alive. Those are my rock-hard values, seeking to live each day with truth and solidity in the best way I can. Yet I also allow for the reality of sandstone, that far more fragile substance that was also laid down by ancient seas. It has never really changed much in actual substance, yet it is the most temporal of all substances. It was sand then, and it is sandy now. It is the dust-to-dust evidence that the Bible draws truth from the earth, and that even things that seem eternal are forever capable of change.

New heaven and new earth

IMG_0275This also applies to the notion that we’ll get an all-new material world when Jesus comes back. That belief entirely misses the foundational truth of scripture. For example, when Jesus told the religious authorities that he would “tear down the temple and rebuild it in three days,” (John 2:19) they were aghast at the literal notion. But that was their mistake. The temple of which Jesus spoke was not a material concept at all.

The same goes for the new heaven and new earth promised in the Book of Revelation and other prophetic references in the Bible. God does not need to literally destroy the world or even conduct a literal worldwide flood to get the message of spiritual repentance across. Clinging to those literal notions only erodes the greater spiritual message of love over law.  It also erases the value of discernment over the brand of stiff-necked orthodoxy that craves material and political power.  That’s the ironic product of literalism and legalism that both John the Baptist and Jesus branded hypocritical and corrupt.

Rock solid values actually allow for the existence of sandstone and the perpetual change of material reality. And yes, evolution fits in that worldview too. All these changes that take place in our world and our universe are not just real, but necessary to reflect the reality of free will.

Surrounding it all, there is Dark Matter, the invisible substance that outlines our existence. I’ll take that as belief in evidence, and evidence of belief.

 

 

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Life tectonics in a sweet season

This is the fifth in a series of articles about the Sweet Season of 1978, my college senior year when our Luther College team placed second in the nation in NCAA Division III cross country. To follow the chronological narrative in full, please begin in order by volume. 

Volume one •  Volume two •  Volume three

Volume Four

After a personal fifth place at the Grinnell invitational September 23, 1978, I noted in my running log that “Hantsbarger outlasted me. Dani first again.” We won the meet and my mileage topped 90 miles for the week.

My method of record-keeping and mileage was not sophisticated, just a pen on paper chart mapping mileage in a converted college composition book. But it worked as well as any modern data tracker today. In the log shown, one can see the difference in the mileage I ran in the spring track and field season and cross county in the fall. In spring I raced steeplechase and 5000 meters, no more than three miles total. In fall we raced four and five mile races in the Division III category for the NCAA.  

IMG_0092.jpg

The weeks ripped by as the typical mileages for each day told the story: Sun 9-6, Mon 5-9, Tues 5-10, Wed 8-9, Thur 3-7, Frid 5-3 and Sat 3-7. Morning workouts were done with a teammate or two. We’d get up at the first light of dawn and run 4-8 miles before our 8:00 a.m. college classes.

Evenings we joined the entire team for longer workouts, much of it done at 6:00 mile pace or under. We trained right through races and raced right through training. Perhaps it wasn’t the ideal approach for a thirteen week season. But that’s how we rolled.

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Our sixth meet of the season was held in Waverly, Iowa, between Luther, Wartburg College and St. Olaf, whose top two runners Mike Palmquist and Matt Haugen were perennial All-Americans. In thinking back on running against them, I reached out to both of those runners via email to ask how much mileage they did in college. Palmquist wrote me back: “

I recall running about 60 miles per week in cross country and 40 miles per week in track. I bumped up those miles during the summer, but the intensity was much lower. I tended to be a low-mileage, high intensity trainer. Matt, on the other hand, ran quite a bit more than I did, mostly by adding morning runs and doing a bit extra on the weekend.  I ended up running higher mileage after I graduated and started competing as a full-time runner, but I seldom ran more than 100 miles per week. I seemed to do much better at 80 to 90.   

Matt Haugen, who went on to complete an 8:40 Ironman Triathlon after his All-American career at St. Olaf, had some interesting mileage tales to tell. He wrote:

My mileage increased every year in college, from 60’s to 100’s.
Senior year, I once ran 161 miles in a week during December. The high mileage senior year resulted in less successful results. As a team, we sometimes got competitive with “mileage wars,” trying to up the ante.
After Haugen’s reply, I forwarded it to a teammate at Luther College, who finished as our sixth man at nationals after fighting the foot injury all season long. He recalled that while Haugen had finished as high as 5th place at NCAA Division III nationals, he wasn’t happy with the results in 1978, the year he upped his mileage so high.
Matt finished right behind me at CC Nationals. He wasn’t so happy with his race. Told him I was sixth man for Luther. He suggested we were going to end up pretty high in team scores.

So were were all living on the edge in one way or another. My daily mileage totals soared hight the very next week to Sun 8-11, Mon 6-8, Tue 3-7-5, Wed 7-7, Thur 3-10, Friday 4-4, and Sat 8-8 for an estimated total of 99 miles, give or take a few. That would be the season’s high mileage. Accurate or not, it likely topped 100.

Staying grounded

My journal from those weeks also recorded consistent efforts to stay grounded through all that running. Sometimes it was just a question of looking around while running through the scenic Oneota Valley in Decorah, Iowa. “Within the last two weeks I have seen two pileated woodpeckers. One flying across the valley below Silvercrest Golf Course. The other I saw on Phelps road just along the river. He called like a cross between a crow and a flicker. Clarinet-like ‘heah-heah.’ A green heron landed along Lindeman pond.”

So my brain was trying to absorb something other than the irreversibility of time while running all those miles. The relationship with my girlfriend continued to deepen in emotional and physical connection. Every week we seemed to immerse ourselves in richer conversation about things that mattered to both of us. We even discussed religion as she was studying Judaism with a Professor or Religion named Richard Simon Hanson. She was somehow drawn to the story of Israel and the Judaic tradition. In truth she even looked a little like what some might call a prototypical Jewish girl with her deep black hair and bright green eyes. Plus she was fiery and tough and musical and determined all at once. I’d never met a woman like her before. It seemed we were meant to be together. 

Missing her

One weekend she flew home to visit her parents. I wrote in my journal: “(She’s) gone for the weekend. I’m a little lonely. I ran well today and have dorm duty, thus no one to share it with. 99 miles this week. I just want to stay healthy and run well. I miss her, although I sort of value the time alone. Now her flight’s delayed.”

The flight mentioned refers to a trip back by private plane from an airport northwest of Chicago. They’d fly her to a small airstrip on a hill east of Decorah. Somehow the flight was arranged through her well-connected parents. So I went to bed in my dorm room alone wondering if this is how love always felt. Like you’d just about die when you were apart from the one you loved. 

Daily pressures

IMG_9862But I couldn’t moon around long… wondering what the next day would bring. The pressure to perform well each week was now firmly on my shoulders. I’d been our second man in all but one meet, so there were now expectations to meet. No longer was it good enough to go out and race and hope to crack the Top 5.

Granted, my rise in the team architecture was partly the result of injuries to two of our formerly men. But the fact of the matter is that timing is everything, and my relative ascendency coincided with a need for someone else to step up.

The same held true with our top runner, a runner who led our distance guys in track and field. He’d previously been one of our Top 5 in cross country, but never the true team leader. That all changed fin the fall of 1978 and he’d won a string of meets in a row.

Plus we were roommates. After every meet when we got back to the dorm, we’d crack open a ceremonial Michelob beer that he kept in his fridge as a reward for good performances. So far we’d not missed an appointment with those black cans of beer. 

Rising stars

As a team we were also the beneficiaries of two stellar freshman that had joined the squad. Both were placing in our Top 5 each week. That meant there was a tinge of the bittersweet in the sweetness of the 1978 season. We’d now won all but one of our meets thus far, but how much better would we be if everyone was healthy? Could we place at nationals? That remained to be seen. 

That said, there were also signs that the training was taking its toll on us all. I noted the presence of a sore calf on October 1. That day we ran thirteen miles in the morning and five at night. Just your average Sunday…

Then came a Monday workout on the hills of Palisades Park. We gathered at the base of a long incline of perhaps three degrees that featured a sharp rise right at the end. Our two-mile warmup to the base of the hill felt great despite the calf soreness from the day before. Then we jogged to the top of the hill, trotted back down at a fair clip and ran hard back up the hill.

“It’s up to you” 

After the fourth of eight such intervals, my former roommate came up to me during a rest phase at the top of the hill. “You have to run great this weekend at St. Olaf,” he told me. “We’re counting on you now.” I found his urgency a bit surprising as I’d not had a faltering week thus far. But I literally looked him in the eye and said, “I know. I’m ready.”

We ran the rest of the hill repeats side by side, almost sharing the same oxygen as we lifted onto our toes on each rise of ground. At the end of the workout, we quietly slapped hands.

It seemed like he was finally coming around from the toe injury that was causing him so much trouble in training and racing. That next spring at track nationals, he’d only miss All-American in the steeplechase by one second. He was one of the best runners ever to come through Luther College, earning individual conference championships in both track and cross country.  He’s now a well-deserved member of Luther’s Athletic Hall of Fame. So I appreciated his call to arms in trying to motivate me for the upcoming race. 

Dangerous camber

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Original marker drawing by Christopher Cudworth

That next day we ran a loop called Freeport. Coach had us doing 100 yard pickups back and forth on the road to sharpen our speed for upcoming meets. But the camber of the road was too steep as the drop from road center to the gravel edge was probably a full foot. That afternoon, I noted in my running journal the next day: “Sore Achilles.”

 

Nearly the whole team wound up lame from that workout. Indeed, I skipped the next two morning runs, settling for runs of six miles in afternoon workouts to let my leg recover. 

In fact the leg was so sore that I visited the campus doctor. He looked me over and prescribed a set of pills that I picked up at the local pharmacy. The bottle read:

Butazolidin

While taking that medicine, I wandered around campus in a complete daze for two or three days. I couldn’t find my way across campus on several occasions. Just by happenstance I hardly made connections with my girlfriend those few days.  She was particularly busy with rehearsals for the Godspell musical in which she was starring.

Our coach was so freaked out by the Achilles problems vexing the whole team that we made a trip up to the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minnesota to visit a prominent doctor who was a Luther graduate. When he asked how I was doing, I handed him the bottle marked Butazolidin and said, “This is what I’m taking.”

He pulled his glasses down in front of his face, then looked back at me in wonder and said, “Stop taking this immediately. This is how much they give to horses.”

In fact, that campus doctor could well have killed me with the amount of medicine he had prescribed. This is how the Medline website describes the relative effects of that drug on humans:

Butazolidin is an NSAID (nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drug). Butazolidin overdose occurs when someone takes more than the normal or recommended amount of this medicine. This can be by accident or on purpose. Butazolidin is no longer sold for human use in the United States. However, it is still used to treat animals, such as horses.

Now, that last sentence is rather funny because our coach always liked to call us his “horses.” It was his way to compliment the way we ran. But now we were all lame as thoroughbreds, and needed to do something fast. So coach took us to a running store in Rochester and purchased us all a brand new pair of Brooks shoes called the Varus Wedge. It was one of the first orthotically designed shoes with an outward camber built into the sole to control pronation. That was our raw prescription for Achilles problems. For many of us, it helped, but a generic prescription of running shoes does not heal everything. There would still be trouble to follow.

Life tectonics*

IMG_9867As if the Achilles soreness and dangerous prescription I was given were not enough of a challenge, that following Monday an incident that took place in the college union that felt like a social earthquake. Walking out of the cafeteria with my girlfriend, I felt her hand suddenly tug backward in mine. I turned in time to see her toss a glass of orange soda straight into the face of a guy that I recognized as a track teammate. She said something on the order of…“Don’t you ever…” and the rest I did not hear because the scene erupted into multiple voices shouting and pushing and confusion.

I did recognize the instant anger on the face of my teammate, and adrenaline quickly pumped into my system. I pulled her toward me wondering, “Will he hit her?”

Quickly I stepped between them and tried to calm the situation. “What’s going on?” I asked half out of fear. I certainly wasn’t prepared to fight the guy. He stood 6’3”, weighed 195 lbs. and was one of our best sprinters in track and a star middle linebacker in football. I weighed 139 lbs. at the time and had 3% body fat. He’d have torn me apart if it had gone that direction.

As calmly as I could, I apologized to my track teammate. He stood inches from me at that moment. That’s when I realized that in all the time we’d spent together in three years of track and field, through countless practices and even competing on the basketball court in intramurals, we’d never been so near to one another. Now we stood face to face, and he was staring over my shoulder at my girlfriend. 

Something in me stood still. At that moment some unspoken bond worked through us both. He looked me in the eye, and then moved away. So I stepped back from the scene of the confrontation. Then I turned to him and said, “I’m sorry man.” I could see that his face was still wet from the orange soda that she’d thrown at him. His companions, including some women, were uttering low threats that I could not really hear. Then the stairwell door closed behind us and I walked away wondering what had just happened. 

All apologies

“Why did you say you’re sorry?” she demanded to know. “Weren’t you going to defend me?”  All I could think is that I had not truly heard or seen all that had happened. Part of me greatly wanted to protect and defend her. Yet part of me honestly trusted my teammate as well. Competing loyalties are a strange thing indeed.

This much I knew: she was feisty like me. Competitive as I was, I’d flown off the handle for small and large offenses on my own in the past. Thus I truly did not know what to think about something that happened so suddenly. Without information or explanations to determine all that, my instincts told me to not judge anyone, to remain calm as possible and to not make things worse by taking sides. 

Change of subject

Luther campus

So we walked back to the dorm together and the subject rapidly changed. We strolled through the pretty campus with its massive oak trees changing color. A cool breeze was coursing over the Oneota Valley and life seemed to return to normal as fast as it had changed. I felt like we’d just lived through an earthquake. 

Over the years, I’ve thought back to that moment in the union. To this day I am not sure exactly what transpired. My track teammate was one of just over 100 black students on campus at the time, several of whom shared rooms with me on track trips. Some were inner city kids that had taken the risk of heading out from the inner city of Chicago to attend college in the cornfields of Iowa at a school of 2400 kids primarily suburban and rural kids from the Midwest. The haven of cultural identity on campus was the Black Student Union. That seemed a blessing in some ways and a curse in others. 

Matters at hand

All I wanted to do after all that upheaval was focus on the meet ahead. The weather had cooled for a few days, yet as we traveled to St. Olaf the temperatures moderated and it turned out to be a dank yet relatively warm day for a race. We stripped down to our Luther singlets and everyone on the team had a serious air about them. It all came down to one thing: We wanted to win again. 

Our hill training came in handy on the St. Olaf course. We won the meet against tough competition, specifically the University of Wisconsin-LaCrosse, whose D3 runners were some of the best in the Midwest. With 800 meters to go, the teammate that had provided focused inspiration earlier in the week ran right on my heels. Finally we closed on a LaCrosse runner ahead of us, a guy that neither of us had likely beaten before. But there was literally no stopping us now. My teammate said “Let’s go” and we started a kick with 400 meters to go. As we came up behind our competitor,Limy teammate said, “Let’s close him off.” So we swung around either side of him and cut back in to form a perfect duo as we sprinted to the finish line. I finished 8th overall in the meet and Luther won the title. Our nearly unbeaten streak in the Sweet Season continued. 

But bigger challenges still lay ahead.

*”Life tectonics” is a term I originally coined in 1981 for a fiction book titled “Admissions”.”  That book accurately predicted social, political and cultural issuesthat would come true in the decades to follow. My son and I are now editing the book for release as it was set in the future, a period we’re living in now. 

Posted in Christopher Cudworth, competition, cross country, track and field, training, triathlete, triathlon, we run and ride | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Sleep it off now and then

IMG_7846During the summer months we often wake quite early to run or ride before the wind and heat pick up. A few times this summer I even rode in the morning on weekdays. That required getting out the door by 5:30 am to get in a thirty mile ride before work.

But it’s now dark at 5:30 a.m. It’s even dark at 6:30 a.m. Daylight savings time will kick in soon, but daylight will still be a critical commodity, and 5:00 in the afternoon will become sundown here in Illinois.

We all deal with our workout schedules on our own terms. Going into the winter months, it is tempting to slack off and not get the same volume going day-to-day. The pounds tend to creep back on as well. Comfort food becomes tempting as the cold weather sets in. It’s a recipe built for the winter blahs.

But one thing I’ve learned year-to-year is that getting more sleep this time of year is as critical as getting in more workouts. The body and brain (in my case) is already adapting to less cumulative sunlight. There’s a tendency toward mood sinks associated with seasonal depression. I recognize the triggers and know the remedies are getting enough sleep AND enough exercise. If you’re training for a really large challenge such as an Ironman triathlon, getting good sleep should be considered the fifth tangent of the sport along with swimming, cycling, running and nutrition. Without good sleep, your body and mind will crash. It’s not an “if,” but a “when” question.

I find that allowing myself an extra thirty to sixty minutes of sleep during the transitional months going into winter can be really helpful to overall well-being.When I get overtired or feel exhausted every day getting out of bed, that’s when negative thoughts and rumination creeps in. It takes discipline to get to bed on time, but that can be really helpful in overall emotional management.

My wife is much stronger about the early morning swim sessions at 5:30. She’s been doing that for years. I’ve joined her a number of times, but coming off a busy weekend it can be tough to pop out of bed on Monday morning at 4:50 a.m. and get off to swim at 5:30. Yes, it often feels good once you’re doing it, yet sometimes there are genuine drags of fatigue during the day. My job sometimes is to get her to rest rather than plug in one more workout at 5:00 a.m.

I’m fortunate to be able to swing home from work during lunch to catch a nap if need be. I always set my alarm for a maximum of thirty minutes of rest. Otherwise I either oversleep or wake up even groggier and feeling depressed. That’s the weirdest thing to me, how I sometimes feel so down coming out of a good nap. Total lethargy. It feels like the whole world is on my back. I’ve become convinced that there is some sort of brain chemistry taking place in mid-afternoon naps that lead to deep sleep.

That’s not usually the case after a really long bike ride or run. Then the nap is recovery. The depressed state is almost like my body and brain telling me, “Okay, that was too much.”

So it’s critical, as Ariana Huffington often preaches, to focus on consistently good sleep. I once tried getting by on six hours of sleep a night during my early 20s. I was running sixty to seventy miles a week at the time. My best friend joined me in the experiment. It quickly went sour. Both of us came down with colds from lack of real rest during all that training.

cudrunSleep needs vary, and in some ways I sleep a little less than I did even back in college, when getting eight solid hours was vital while training 300-400 miles a month in distance running.

These days, I forgive myself for feeling sleepy and wanting to get enough rest. I work a full-time job, do freelance writing as well, volunteer on several civic and arts boards, write and paint for publication and shows, and enjoy socializing during much of the week and weekend.

Then I run three to four times a week, swim two days a week and usually cycle a couple days a week as well. It’s no wonder I’m tired now and then. I’m happy doing all that for the most part. But there are times when a genuine recharge is critical.

It’s all about self-care. If stress or busy schedules add up, it literally pays to sleep it off now and then. Pull the covers up. Reschedule that workout or replace it with something later in the day. Cozy up and let your toes curl under the covers. It’s not a sin. In fact, it may be a lifesaver.

Sleep it off now and then.

 

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When you’re so popular it hurts

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The harvest display at the Morton Arboretum

This past Sunday my wife and I took a trip to meet up with friends at the Morton Arboretum, one of the Chicago area’s most popular places to commune with nature and frolic among the trees.

We were attending one of the Walking Plays the Arboretum hosts. This one was focused on the writings of the Brother’s Grimm, and consisted of stops to hear shortened versions of the often gruesome stories concocted by the famous literary siblings.

For example, one of the stories featured a despotic king with a blue beard who tempted all his wives with a Golden Key to a door they should not open. But sure enough, much like the tale of Eve with the Serpent in the Garden of Eden, the women succumbed to temptation anIMG_0004d in this case, wound up hung on meat hooks where their blood apparently flowed eternally, because every new queen who opened the door got washed with the blood of the previous victims. Only this time, the queen had given notice to her brothers that if she ever called to them from the tower they should come running to her rescue. So when the king warned her that she was about to become a member of the Meat Hook Clan inside the door protected by the Golden Key, she asked if she could go say her prayers in the tower. First.

And then she called her brothers who slayed the king and the entire family got to keep the treasures behind all the other doors to which the queen also now had all the keys.

Members Only

That’s kind of a Member’s Only tale about the respecting the rules of the premises. Lord knows the dynamic is alive and well even at the public recreation facility where we belong. There is a regular old locker room downstairs for the common folk. Then there’s an upstairs locker room to which admission is granted only if you pay a premium.

That’s how the human race has to function, I guess. There’s always some sort of “premium” or first class offer going on. Many times that’s the generate profits for the seller. After all, if people are willing to pay more, why not give them the right to spend their money and make themselves feel better and more privileged than others. That’s capitalism in a nutshell.

But it’s also a kind of caste system in which people with more money are always getting access to the nicer things in life. But here’s the irony in that. Sometimes people who pay for memberships, or people who work hard all day for their money actually wind up getting the shaft.

For edification on this fact, we’ll share the Parable of the Workers in the Vineyard, which goes like this from the Book of Matthew:

Laborers in the Vineyard

20 “For the kingdom of heaven is like a master of a house who went out early in the morning to hire laborers for his vineyard. 2 After agreeing with the laborers for a denarius1 a day, he sent them into his vineyard. 3 And going out about the third hour he saw others standing idle in the marketplace, 4 and to them he said, ‘You go into the vineyard too, and whatever is right I will give you.’ 

5 So they went. Going out again about the sixth hour and the ninth hour, he did the same. 6 And about the eleventh hour he went out and found others standing. And he said to them, ‘Why do you stand here idle all day?’ 7 They said to him, ‘Because no one has hired us.’ He said to them, ‘You go into the vineyard too.’ 8 And hwhen evening came, the owner of the vineyard said to his iforeman, ‘Call the laborers and pay them their wages, beginning with the last, up to the first.’ 

9 And when those hired about the eleventh hour came, each of them received a denarius. 10 Now when those hired first came, they thought they would receive more, but each of them also received a denarius. 11 And on receiving it they grumbled at the master of the house, 12 saying, ‘These last worked only one hour, and you have made them equal to us who have borne the burden of the day and jthe scorching heat.’ 13 But he replied to one of them, k‘Friend, I am doing you no wrong. Did you not agree with me for a denarius? 14 Take lwhat belongs to you and go. I choose to give to this last worker as I give to you. 15 mAm I not allowed to do what I choose with what belongs to me? Or ndo you begrudge my generosity?’2 16 So othe last will be first, and the first last.”

Members can wait

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The traffic line entering the Morton Arboretum on Sunday at 2:00 pm

See, that kind of happened to us recently at the Morton Arboretum. Sue and I have been members the last five years, and I’ve personally been a member forever, on and off. We go over to the Arb to run sometimes. Typically we park our vehicles in the main lot and run the 7.5 miles of roads on the east and west side of the park that is split by state highway 53, a busy suburban thoroughfare that runs from the far southwest side of Chicago all the way to Lake County about 35 miles to the north.

And this Sunday we pulled onto 53 to enter the Arb and traffic was backed up a full mile. That’s because the Arboretum has an enormously popular exhibit of large scale wooden trolls. Thousands of people are coming on weekends to seek out the trolls hidden in the woodlands or parked in the open sun, where one giant troll lolls in an orchard-like environment.

Popular beyond imagination 

Morton-Arboretum-Troll-Laying-DownThe trolls are so popular and so profitable that the system to admit visitors has been overwhelmed by the amount of traffic entering the facility. As we experienced last Sunday, the lines to get in extend for a mile.

At the gate, the Arboretum charges $15 per person for general admission if one is not a member. That means a carload of four people generates income of $60. Multiply that times 1,000 cars on a given Saturday and Sunday, and the revenue is $120,000 a day. Add up the weekends from May through October and we’re talking $720,000 just in admission fees to non-members. That’s serious money.

Members don’t pay any additional fees to enter during special events such as the Troll Hunt. Our family membership for two is probably $90 or so. Certainly membership fees are vital to the mission of the Arb. But those raw dollars coming in from the big exhibits such as Troll Hunt and the annual Illumination event are attractions that really help bankroll the place. The Arb treats them as equals. Which is frankly as it should be. Their money is as good as ours.

Go Slow and Know

So as members, we’re kind of like the “laborers” who signed up early to “work”, then  along come all these frantic visitors piling into the joint with one goal in mind: “We gotta see all the trolls.” There’s just one problem: the drivers of these vehicles don’t seem to get the concept of the Go Slow and Know ethic that typically governs movement through the Arboretum. It’s supposed to be a place of contemplation and respect for trees. But parents with carloads of kids and backseats with grumpy grandmothers don’t have time for all that. The kids want to get the heck out of the car and grandma’s feet already hurt from walking, so it pays to race from one place to another. If a few runners or cyclists get in your way, blow right past them. Life has speed bumps, don’t you know?

Churn and berm

I commiserate with the plight of the Morton Arboretum. It’s not cheap to own land these days, especially land that sits smack dab in the center of the region’s busiest corporate corridor.It takes real money to maintain thousands of acres in the face of all that development. There’s even a campus across I-88 that calls itself Corporetum, which  somewhat cynically borrows the land ethic of the arb to pitch commercial property.

Morton Salt GirlsIt’s also not the Arboretum’s fault that the preserve is surrounded by really big roads, especially to the south with Interstate 88 and on its east side with I-355. When those roads were expanded some thirty years ago, the project provided for massive earthen berms to be built to protect the Morton Arboretum from road noise and, quite ironically it seems, from the hazards of road salt flying off the highway.

The Morton family that started the Arboretum made its fortune in the salt industry. The classic logo for Morton Salt products features the phrase “When it rains, it pours.” That could also symbolize the problems the Morton Arboretum is now having with its large crowds and visitors pouring in through the entrances to see the trolls. When it rains visitors, it seems, it really pours.

American phenomenon

IMG_9998.JPGThe problems faced by the crowds crushing it at Morton Arboretum are in many ways an American phenomenon. Yet true to form, there’s an iconic image right at the entrance to the Morton Arboretum. One of the first trolls one encounters is holding aloft what looks like a giant stone. Below him on the turf grass is a smashed car. The troll is obviously taking out its natural frustrations on the car.

The entire troll theme at the Arboretum is a commentary of sorts about the onslaught against nature by the intrusions of the human race. A tall solitary troll stands atop the massive berm overlooking I-88. The troll’s hair is formed of twisted stands of bunch up branches. It’s rotund body and stolid face suggest a creature that walks a fine line between organic indulgence and eternal vigilance. It holds a lance as if to fend off all those who would invade its precious premises.

Trolls.jpg

Salt of the earth

Perhaps it is symbolic of a “salt of the earth” ethic that somehow we are all called to protect this thing called creation. The earth is both a popular and a populous place, but it’s also the only one we have. That turns the well-worn paths to and from the troll statues into something of a warning. It’s fine to treasure an attraction and celebrate its unique qualities, but it is also important not to wear out our welcome and adversely impact our resources as a whole in the process.

If it’s true that the meek shall inherit the earth, then it’s not likely the ones who consume and abuse it willfully and wantonly that will be the ones to gain that inheritance. In the short term, they may indeed reign over the world. They may choose to ignore scientific warnings of climate change based on political and economic ideology. They may leverage the power and authority granted by a legalistic (and literalistic) view of religion to claim dominion over the earth and claim the merits of the pseudo-science they call creationism. They may trumpet the benefits of capitalism when it privatizes the profits and hide from view when it socializes the costs. All these zealots imagine themselves to be the strong and noble amongst us, but the fact remains: the meek shall one day inherit the earth.

And who are the meek? They are the good stewards who accept (like laborers in the vineyard) that the compensations afforded by the Go Slow and Know approach to existence may come late to some. Hopefully the people who now tear through the Arboretum in the heat of summer or who indulge in fevered expectation at the attraction of trolls will go slow when they return. Then the snow will sit quietly on the land and the only noise is the humble chip of a woodpecker working the bark of an old oak for its daily meal. But that is the point.

And that’s what the trolls truly represent. Despite being so popular that it hurts, in the end, they truly appreciate their alone time.

 

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Tarsnakes, Trick or Treat and Bad Brakes

IMG_9822.JPGWe got up to ride this past Saturday after a fun little Halloween Party in a restored barn with a Haunted House. We took part in plenty of food and drinks, and got home late.

So I felt a little fuzzy crawling out of bed to put on cycling gear. The weather turned cool and we layered up. I’d actually forgotten that last spring I’d purchased new bib tights. My faithful old Specialized cycling tights finally wore through at the butt.

The new ones complement a new red cycling jacket that I’d purchased at a parking lot sale held at Performance Bike. So the entry into the cool fall riding season was done in style.

IMG_8190Tarsnakes on the road

Stocked with water bottles and a well-charged Garmin, I traded pulls with Sue for five or six miles. But I really started feeling it into a stiff northwest wind. By the time we got to the first climb of the day at nine miles, my legs felt shot. I thought: “Is this a hangover?”

That’s one of the tarsnakes of drinking. It’s seems fun until the price of the alcohol creeps up on you from behind. Then it’s all about slogging your way through the not-so-proud moments.

I had not done that much drinking the night before. Enough perhaps to resemble an addled cowboy when we got home. But I certainly didn’t wake up sick or suffering a headache. And yet my legs the next morning were seriously dead. All I could do was credit that effect to the big winds and the party the night before.

IMG_9805At some point I started to fall away and clawed back onto Sue’s wheel. But soon enough I told her, “Go on ahead,” and smiled at her with a shrug. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”

Tough going even downhill

As we turned south the road went downhill and still it was tough for me to keep up with her. “This is weird,” I said out loud. But I kept riding along at 14-15 mph.

Finally, our loop turned true east and the wind was seriously behind my back. The rush of air in my ears disappeared, and that’s when I heard it. The hiss of brake pads on metal wheel rims. I stopped and popped the wheel out of place, then pushed it to its proper position. Within two pedal strokes I knew that I’d found the problem.

What a stupid problem for any serious cyclist to have. Apparently the wheel had been out of line all along. When I struck a pothole at 10 miles while trying to stay close on Sue’s wheel, the thing had really gotten out of whack. But I fixed the damn thing and that was my Trick or Treat moment for the day.

On the way home, I arrived at a major Strave segment and decided to let my frustrations out by riding hard and fast. With the strong wind at my back, I rode at 30mph+ for a stretch and wound up breaking my prior best for the segment by quite a bit. Sure, that was a guilty pleasure and a bit of a cheat. But that’s the nature of the Halloween season.

Sorry babe

At home I apologized to Sue for my stupid mistake. She was worried, she told me. We’d just ridden thirty miles together the week before and I was doing many of the longer pulls into the wind.

Well it wasn’t a lack of fitness holding me back after all. It was my tricky little brakes. No wonder I felt so shot for most of the ride. I’d tricked myself into thinking I was out of shape. But once I released the wheel from the brakes, the ride home was a treat.

I think I deserve some candy corn in consolation. Don’t you think?

Candy Corn.jpg

 

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Get fit while lying down (and be like Emma)

I follow American steeplechaser Emma Coburn on Instagram. She even provided answers to her success through an interview published on this blog.  This week she posted a hyper little demonstration of how she uses a fitness band to improve the strength and durability of her hip flexors. So I watched her do all those exercises and set a goal to “Be Like Emma.”

And look at these photos!! She could be my Fitness Sister, don’t you think?

Be Like EmmaIMG_9744

Stretchy vow

Back when I purchased my New Balance 880 training shoes (just like Emma!) at Dick Pond Athletics in St. Charles, I sprung for a yellow fitness band along with the purchase.

That band has been lying on the dresser in a wrinkled heap for four weeks now. Meanwhile, every time I run more than an hour my hip flexors tire out and tighten up.

Emma CoburnWell, duh. It might be time to do something about that, ya think?

Weak hip flexors holding you back? Pick up a yellow (or red, or grey, or green, or blue) band and lie down. Or stand up like Emma.  Of course, she can one-legged squats all the way to the floor and back up. In fact she looks like she could do those all day long.

I started working with the band by standing up. That has value when it comes to teaching yourself balance. But then I got down on the floor and used that stretchy band for a full thirty minutes. That’s a good way to start when your hip flexors are weak like mine They need work before you can even gain much benefit from standing up. Like Emma.

IMG_9768So I rolled around like a writhing little gator on the shag carpeting in our bedroom and worked those little hip (hop) flexors like they haven’t been worked in years.

Small ball fitness

Those connective tissues and “small joint problems” did not used to be problem for me. As an active athlete that played basketball in the off-season, or soccer, the hip flexors and other ‘small-ball’ players in the overall physiology got a consistent workout.

But now that I’m sixty and sit at a desk much of the day, and don’t play ballistic sports because my left knee has no ACL after it was torn the second time, the idea of cutting and turning in tennis or other sports to keep muscular balance is just not a good idea. Too much risk of catastrophic injury.

Stretching body and mind

So it’s onto the ground and use the stretchy band. I’m not going to offer some tutorial on how to do that. I’m no expert. But I know what hurts on my body, and how to stretch it. So that’s what I do. It will definitely help in the long run with hip flexors strength, durability and endurance.

But getting fit isn’t all about working muscles and joints. There’s also the head to consider.

Breathing poses no problem

Partway through the experience I slipped into a yoga position called Child’s Pose. That’s where you essentially curl your upper body over your folded legs and sometimes extend your arms in a passive or active stretch. There I lay, breathing for the sake of breathing. In…out. In…out. Finding my center.

IMG_9763I even grasped my own head in my hands for a minute. Just let the contact between hands and head resonate and carry all the way back through my toes. I was my own compact ball of sixty-year-old energy. Breathing. 

Then I finished another fifteen minutes of stretching and combined it with some planks and pushups. I’ll be adding core work to this routine, which I like because I don’t have to drive anywhere to do it.

And when it’s all done I’ll just lie down and let it all sink in. As long as you can still stretch, you’re still alive.

Thanks Emma Coburn, for the inspiration to stop neglecting my hip flexors.

 

 

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A sweet season heats up

This is the fourth in a series of articles about the Sweet Season of 1978, my college senior year when our Luther College team placed second in the nation in NCAA Division III cross country.

Volume one •  Volume two •  Volume three

MANKATO RACE

That’s me leading the way around a bend on the upper campus during a meet against Mankato. This was sophomore year, when I still wore glasses.

Nothing comes easy when you’re training 80-100 mile weeks. It was vital to get lots of sleep. That’s not always easy on a college campus. Adding to that challenge was the fact that my Resident’s Assistant duties kept me up late sometimes on Friday and Saturday nights. Then one night I was walking the dorm floor and noticed pot smoke roiling out from a room. I knocked and when the door opened, a host of my cross country teammates were lying around the room stoned. “Come on, guys,” I warned them. “Put a towel in front of the door, you rookies.” 

Pot jointYes, we ran quite a bit. And yes, we partied sometimes. But never enough to truly hold back our performances.

So by the fourth meet of the season, scheduled for a Saturday in Grinnell, Iowa, our Luther College cross country team was finding a groove of sorts. We traveled in a fleet of cars rather than a bus, and stayed with alumni or current student families that lived in the area rather than hotel rooms. It was like living a hippie commune lifestyle. 

Race results

I’d finish the race in 25:55 in the first five-mile competition of the season. The meet was held on a rolling golf course layout. Our Nike waffle racing flats were perfect for those conditions. We won the team title but engaged in a hard-fought race with conference rival Central College. It was a sunny, warm day and early in the race I found myself sharing the lead for a few strides. Then thought better of it. There were 4.5 more miles to go, and I knew that our lead guy and his top rival were about to start fighting it out. 

I’d wind up third man as I recall, and happy to finish strong as the victory came down to a few strategic places. I remember racing stride for stride with a runner from Central named Brian. That season we’d bang heads a number of times. Forty years later I reachd out to him through Linkedin. We exchanged friendly greetings. I complimented him on a healthy rivalry. He wrote back through Linkedin:

Chris – we both had more hair back in our college days! I think that you got your facts wrong – I am sure that you beat me more often than I beat you.

My high point of my running days was winning the conference track championship my senior year. We had to outscore the mighty Luther in the next to last race – the 5K – to do it. I believe that we finished 3, 4 and 5 in the race. This was after Luther had finished 2nd or 1st in the cross-country DIII championship that previous fall.

My running days are over. When I turned 50 I started running again and was able to break 40 minutes in the 10K but then my legs started giving me problems so I had to quit.

I probably should start riding a bike instead as I believe you do.

Take care,

Brian

IMG_6115 2I definitely recall the track race he mentioned. I had tried to double back in the 5000 meters after winning the steeplechase earlier that day. But my legs didn’t have the zip and my performance fell short, clocking a slow 15:20. With their effort, Central College took the conference track championship after Luther had won it for 17 years straight. I also recall some very bad sportsmanship that day when some of their athletes cheered when our All-American 400-meter hurdler shattered his leg going over the last barrier. Things almost came to blows on the infield between our two teams. They were sick of us winning and likely considered us arrogant. But old rivalries, even bitter ones, tend to disappear over the years.

Coming home

Coming back home after the meet, we arrived to find a warm fall afternoon, the 23rd of September. Some of us gathered the gumption to run a few more miles when we got home. That meant we’d covered four miles in the morning, two miles warmup before the race and a cool down on top of five miles of racing. Then another three miles of running when we got home. Quite the day. 

The next morning we got up to run a twenty-miler in the warm sun of September. All at six minute pace.

So I was tired and feeling a bit weary from all the racing and training when my girlfriend arrived back on campus that Sunday after making a visit back home to see her folks. While she was home, another suitor got wind of her visit and made some ardent ovations to win her attention. He invited her over to his apartment, and the guy found a way to traipse around naked to show off his ample dick.

She shared that story with me. At the time, I frankly wondered how she could even let herself get up in that position with a guy. If she truly loved me, why would she let that happen? Over time, I’ve realized that women trying to figure out their goals in life are more than willing to play the field and see what happens. In nature, even female cardinals entertain secret suitors when their birdy mates are away. 

No doubt:  I questioned what his motives were and hers as well. She explained that he was already out of college and working a job. Her parents liked the guy and they had suggested he might be worth seeing. Well, that came literally true, did it not? It taught me that her folks were not nearly as smart as they pretended to be. 

Thus I decided to follow my instincts and proceed with confidence rather than fall into some trap of jealousy that might make me look weak and insecure. I was done with that in life. Yet that moment, I learned to distrust her parents a bit. And to some degree, also her. 

Familial relations

Then I found out that her mother had actually met my father once back in Illinois. They were both enrolled in some kind of motivational selling course in the mid-1970s. That was not the high point of my father’s career or life. In fact he’d blown some money on a scammy network marketing scheme that had severely messed up our family financial picture and caused us to give up a lovely large house that we owned for a small split level that we rented. I get it: he was trying to create his big break in life. When that didn’t work out, he tried to leverage that negative experience into something worthwhile. That’s when he enrolled in that course and met her mother. She confessed her own reasons for taking that course with a bit of chagrin. Apparently it wasn’t her proudest moment in life either. 

Still, I was deeply in love with that girl, and things were going great on many fronts. But a slice of that life began to feel suddenly weird. I grew into a close observer of reality pretty quickly Her parents were seemingly well-off. They lived in a fairly wealthy Chicago suburb. Their house was a classic colonial overlooking a relatively spacious landscape of other classic colonials. Her dad commuted to Chicago to work everyday. When he got home, he’d go out for a 1.5 mile run-walk to work off the stress of his job. Then he’d stumble in the house sweaty and flop down in his favorite La-Z-Boy chair, because that’s where he worked.  

There was another dimension and connection in all those familial relations. Well before I met my new girlfriend, I’d somehow already come to know her brother. I felt for him because he’d been in some sort of accident earlier in life and had a brain injury that left him with some memory loss and some behavioral difficulties. It made schooling difficult for him at times, and we’d commiserated after I learned he was from Illinois and we shared a ride home at one point. But her family was bitter toward the college over how he’d been treated when his brain problems flared up. They had a chip on their shoulders about all that. 

Feeling chippy 

Cud with Maravich skillsIn fact there seemed to be a collective chip on everyone’s shoulder in that household. But they had a Golden Boy attitude toward the youngest member of the family, a son that was a junior in high school at the time I met her. When we visited their house during some fall break, my girlfriend started bragging about his basketball skills, intimating that he’d wipe the court with me if I ever played him. So I took that challenge, and beat him 10-2 in a game of one-on-one. I was a damned good basketball player and wasn’t going to take that kind of challenge lightly. 

She was a bit angry about the way I played so hard against her brother, and showed no mercy. But I told her, “What did you expect? I don’t know why all the women I’ve known always underestimate me as an athlete, and in other ways.” That stopped her cold for a moment and she admitted, “You’re right. I’m sorry. I love you.” And I loved her. There were so many other ways that we clicked.

It’s true that I had a pretty big chip on my own shoulder fueled by a host of past insecurities that I’d been working hard to overcome. In some ways, that’s the core of what brought my girlfriend end and I together. We both shared that “chip on our shoulder” mentality. In fact that previous year, she’d lost a lot of weight while I’d shaved off my ugly beard and cut my long hair. So we were ‘born again’ as fellow “chippies” and now were well matched. 

Perhaps her goal was to find a guy at Luther (or somewhere) that she might marry once she got out of college. Yet the concept of marriage was still foreign to me. That was a bit naive I suppose. Instead I was focused on the boyish and comparatively innocent task of running as fast as I could for as long as I could.

Deep inside a voice kept asking, “Is that some kind of sin? Is it so bad to be focused on this one thing in my life?” It was not. The truth of the matter is that all of us arrive at singular moments in our lives. In that moment we have “One Shot!” as the musical Hamilton so aptly suggests, to do this one thing that can be life changing.

I thought she should realize that was the case for both of us. She was also involved in a pursuit of her own, a performance of Godspell that was challenging and thrilling at the same time. She really could sing and dance with the best of them. Yet a Jackson Browne song that came out during the second year of our relationship that perfectly described how things were evolving: 

She was a friend to me when I needed one
Wasn’t for her I don’t know what I’d done
She gave me back something that was missing in me
She could have turned out to be almost anyone
Almost anyone–
With the possible exception
Of who I wanted her to be

Thus even in the moment, I respected her focus as well as the “chip-on-the-shoulder” determination that made her an invited partner in my own pursuits. Plus she had green eyes that just killed me every time I looked into them. But in the end, it may never have been meant to be more than that. That is just how love works sometimes. 

Standing up for myself

Yet in giving all of this consideration in the moment, I determined that the Dick Display challenge from the guy back home should be confronted. Thus I told her straight up, “I don’t want you to see him anymore.” I had never said anything of that sort to any woman that I’d ever known. She immediately agreed. She even seemed to be pleased that I had displayed determination and a sense of ownership toward our relationship. That is love too. It’s quirky and unpredictable. 

Feeling good about myself

However it also worked the other way as well. I was hanging out at a local pub four blocks from campus one night, having beers with my buddies when a lovely female classmate showed up behind me in the crowd. I’d turned around and was having a nice conversation with her, digging the crystal clear blue of her big eyes and blonde Norwegian looks. Her blouse stretched open between her breasts and the sight of her bra inside had me excited and curious about what it might be like to be with her.

So there I was, perched at the top of my social popularity after four relatively lonely years on campus, able at last to show some personality and pursue some pleasure. Now I had a series of great races behind me and a growing reputation for success on campus. Suddenly another beautiful girl had taken notice. I was taking notice back. 

And that moment is exactly when my girlfriend walked through the pub door and stepped directly between us. She knew competition when she saw it. Nothing was said but the message was clear. “You’re mine.” My potential new blonde friend gave a flash of her blue eyes and disappeared. She went on to become a doctor. Would that ever have worked? Those are questions to which we never know the answer. 

So that’s the problem with love. For better or worse, it tends to put a glow on you that other people see. Certainly other women see it. They’ve got a radar of some sort that lets them zoom in on a guy with something going on. Self confidence, you might say, is the ultimate aphrodisiac. 

Mankato and Decorah.jpeg

Matters at hand

So the relationship stuff was buzzing around in the background as the weeks rolled by.  But my focus was true, and there were critical running matters at hand.

We had a Tuesday meet scheduled against the University of Minnesota-Mankato. I recalled that the first time we ran against them when I was just a freshman. Our team left in mid-afternoon. as we made the drive up from Decorah, Iowa to Mankato, the weather cooled and there noticeably fewer leaves on the trees. We hadn’t come that much farther north, but the seasons had progressed a bit quicker. 

Oregon Waffle racers.jpgA cool wind blew off the flat landscape of southwestern Minnesota as we jogged around the course in our bulky cotton sweats and noted that the course was composed partly of cinder trails and grass. That led us to check our spike lengths, because short spikes do not work well on cinders. Only a few teammates by then were wearing the Oregon Waffle racers we’d ordered because the shoes were so popular they were on back order through a running shop in Minneapolis. Such were the early days of the Nike era. 

After the course tour, we stripped down to our racing singlets and stood there shivering as the coach from Mankato described the course. Then he bluntly stated that mile times would only be given out to the first few runners to pass. The rest were out of luck.

That made our coach extremely mad. He believed in the value of every runner on the team. He wanted every runner in the race to be given mile splits out there on the course. So he dispensed our team trainers to cover the mile points at two and four. It was cool out, probably in the high 40s, but the chill in the air was mostly between that coach and ours.

Hot for revenge

Somewhere in the archives of my cross country stuff the results of that meet are buried. But the memory of that conflict about mile splits never was forgotten. Thus when Mankato showed up on our campus for a dual meet on Thursday, September 26, 1978, we were all ready to run hard and beat them. They were always a good team, but we knew something special was going on at Luther College. 

As it turned out, those poor Mankato guys had dressed for the weather back on their campus, which was much cooler when they left. Their runners all wore heavy dark blue jerseys with sleeves that came down to the elbows. The material was a deeply woven shiny fabric that held in heat quite well.

And that was a problem for them, because the afternoon they showed up was hot, somewhere in the low 80s, and they were already sweating like hell as they joined us on the starting line. We all secretly smiled at each other, and while my time of 26:18 was nothing to brag about in terms of a five-mile effort, it was much faster than even their fifth man. We wiped them off the map.

Next steps

But things were not all perfect heading into the next steps of the Sweet Season.  Two of my former roommates on the team were still struggling with injuries. It was strange for me to be running well for the team when those guys were not up to par. There was a vague sense of guilt and a keen sense of responsibility at the same time. 

cudrunCertainly I’d led teams before, all the way through high school in fact, I was one of the top runners. Truth be told, I had trained for a moment or running revelation during all four years of college. I was coming into my own.

Now that I no longer had to rise early in the morning to work the dish room as I did the first three years of college, thanks to a new job on campus, I could train those early mornings and pump all my energy into athletic performance. Along with the improved self-image and dumping those stupid glasses on my face, it felt like anything was possible. 

There was nothing to do but look ahead, keep on loving my girlfriend and keep putting one foot in front of the other. That’s the only way we get anywhere in life. 

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