Share and share alike

One of the interesting aspects of endurance sports like swimming, cycling and running is that there is so much to share. Essentially, there are four ways to share.

  1. Share your experience. When you have knowledge to share, it can really help others.
  2. Share your experiences. When you train or compete, your experiences tell a story.
  3. Share your enthusiasm. Sharing love of the sport is a positive way to get feedback.
  4. Share your challenges. To overcome difficulties is part of the sport. Share it.

You’ll notice there is an inverse to the manner in which we all share. As a new participant in any of these activities, or all three when it comes to triathlon, the things we tend to share first are our challenges and enthusiasm. And understand, it is not uncommon for people to complain during this phase, or lament the results of their most recent workout or race. Still others will hit a plateau during training or races. These are forgiveable shares.

 

EXPERIENCE TRIATHLON GALS

A group of training partners can be a valuable resource of friendship and shared experience.

That’s the hallmark of someone pushing themselves to do better. Progress is seldom a straight line proposition. So we verbalize those challenges as we get deeper into the respective sports.

 

The kid who lives behind me is a high school freshman. His middle school team won the state championship in cross country last year. He’s running six days a week now with the high school cross country team. Yet the first question I asked him was simple: “Are the other runners good guys?” And he answered, “Yes, most of them.”

Because that’s the most important thing in a training environment. How do the people around you respond to your challenges and your enthusiasm? Do they answer questions and share their experience? That’s the sign of a good environment.

Most of the time, this information-sharing occurs through people relating their experiences, not their experience. People usually don’t like to brag about what they know, or make themselves out to be know-it-alls. Instead, they share experiences or tell stories about their efforts in training or racing. These are meant to convey their experience.

 

Rupp and Meb

You may recall that Meb had some experience to share with Galen Rupp in the Olympic Trials marathon about how not to bump into other competitors.

Some of these shared stories can be funny. But often they relate a deeper truth. If someone throws up after a high school cross country race because they ate a donut just before the start, that’s a funny story. But it shares important facts about what not to eat when you’re about to compete.

 

So this sharing process plays an important role in all our development.

As a longtime distance runner, I’m learning that the most important thing I have to share is experience in how to train for races. People who pick up the sport of running or triathlon in their twenties, thirties, forties or beyond often do not have the baseline experience of running track or cross country in high school. As a result, they typically learn one way to train. Quite often that is doing their race pace in training, over and over again. Their methods may make them faster for a while, but ultimately they run into a wall of sorts. Progress ceases, and they wonder why.

The answer lies in aerobic thresholds and learning to train much faster than your desired race pace. It’s a simple rule: To get faster, you absolutely must run faster than race pace in training. Doing race pace over and over again may build endurance, but it has its limits in terms of building speed.

The trick, therefore, is to run paces that both physically and perceptually stretch your baseline race pace.

Of course, this is true in cycling as well. Yet most of us go out and barrel around at 18-20 mph on our own, thinking this will magically transform us into 22-24 mph cyclists. That isn’t going to happen. To ride much faster, you must do intervals at even faster speeds than your desired race pace. That would be 24-26 mph and better yet, even faster. If nothing else, one must get into a group that rides those faster paces and hang on for dear life. You may get dropped at first, but the goal is to stick a little longer every time.

That’s how the pros do it. And when they ride an easy day, they take it really easy. Their riding thus covers an entire range of speeds and aerobic needs. The really long slow rides build aerobic endurance while the speed training raises the heart rate.

 

suzy-favor-hamilton

Coaches often play an important role in picking us up when we’re down.

 

It is this knowledge and these methods that coaches are supposed to share with athletes. However, coaches can fall into a trap of prescribing the same types of workouts year after year because the formula works to produce certain types of results. A triathlon coach who gets people over the finish line in an Ironman is a valuable commodity. Yet that same coach might not be helpful to athletes seeking to refine a specific aspect of their triathlon performance.

That’s where event-specific coaching comes in. Or, you can opt to work with other athletes whose experience with ability and experience in those specific events. That type of shared experience is often free. Be prepared to ask when the opportunity presents itself, and most experienced athletes are quite willing to help. It’s an organic feature of endurance sports that your fellow athletes want to help other people in their sports.

This is tricky in a sport like swimming, where advice on proper swimming form can be conflicting on many levels. It is best to confine your form coaching to a set of specific, trusted resources. Ask other athletes who to trust, or hire a coach and stick to what they say. Nothing slows you down faster than trying too many things in your swim form. That’s asking for trouble, not help.

Be prepared to accept that there are some people who refuse to share their experience. But you typically don’t need them in your life. Sharing is something we’re supposed to learn and socialize in preschool. But the competitive nature of some people takes over. Even your close friends can become your worst enemies in training and competition. I advised my children when they reached late elementary school that it is often wise to realize your friends are prone to want to control you or leverage advantage in many facets of life. That’s not being paranoid. It’s a fact. Those same dynamics are played out in politics, religion, business and relationship. Human beings are competitive characters. And they aren’t always honest about their motives.

 

pre-olympics

The heat of competition is no time to ask others to share advice.

Which sadly means that some advice is also best not taken without some consideration. People on the starting line of a race can be profound liars. I have been guilty of this manner of competitive lying. Yet I have also shared what I believe the truth to be in competitive experiences. While racing in a five-mile mid-summer race years ago, I knew that I was supremely fit and did not believe anyone in the field could beat me. A mile into that race, a competitor turned to me and asked, “What pace are you going to run today?”

 

I replied, “Faster than you,” and took off with a surge that left everyone in the dust. In that situation, I was not going to share an advantage of any sort. But why should I? There are some situations in life where winning or beating your rivals is the order of the day. There is nothing at all wrong with that. You can share stories and experiences after the racing’s done. Laugh or cry about the difficulties.

The one thing you are not obligated to share in 99% of most circumstances is your focus. yes, if someone is in need or you feel motivated to help another competitor out somehow, that is a great thing. That’s sharing yourself with someone in need. That is the greatest of all shares, if you think about it. And I’d say the first four types of sharing prepare you for that noble cause when it comes around.

 

 

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Pokemon Go can’t get into the track

Pokemon Go Fence TooIn case you have not yet heard, the app Pokemon Go is getting tons of teenage and twenty-somethings out of the house to walk their neighborhoods in search of fictitious creatures to capture on their phones.

I asked a middle school kid to show me the game on his smartphone and explain it. But like the original Pokemon card game that my kids enjoyed playing twenty years ago, this new version of Pokemon left me cold.

It’s not supposed to appeal to adults like me. But I have an additional layer of prejudice toward games of that nature because my longtime, avid interest in the actual natural world frequently finds me discovering far more interesting things than the world of badly drawn mashups of animals with bad attitudes and weird habits.

But I do believe firmly in the right of all people to let their imaginations wander where they need or want to go, even if that is a place manufactured and owned by a massively corporate method of engagement. Such is life in the Big City.

Oops I got some exercise

Whatever the outcome, kids doing Pokemon Go are actually getting tons of exercise. That’s something in which I also believe. And as one parent of an avid Pokemon Go player said to me, “For all the efforts of Michelle Obama to get kids to exercise…kids are walking more from playing Pokemon Go than anything else.”

It’s true. And you should check out this hilarious link to a Gizmodo web story on the Pokemon Go phenomenon.

The game basically plays a huge virtual reality trick on kids to get them to locations where Pokemon characters can be nabbed. You can also collect “eggs,” I am told, which is a prized bit of ownership. The trick to the game is that you have to walk another 5.1 kilometers to get the egg to hatch. Pretty sneaky stuff.

Trick or treat

Pokemon Go FenceSo what evil parent dreamed this up?

It plays like a comedy routine from Daniel Tosh, who revels in perverse irony.

That means it will only be a week or so before the evangelical Christian community begins its protest of the Pokemon Go game.

The meme with conservative Christians is almost always the same. They’ll say that Pokemon is a product of the Gay Agenda, or the product of atheists trying to steal the attention of children away from Jesus.Just you watch. It’s going to happen in 3…2…1…

And while writing this blog, I entered “Christians protest Pokemon Go…” and found this stunning admission by the inventor of the original game. He was reputedly trying to contradict his anti-evolution Christian parents. But as a person with an education in biology, the thing that always bugged me about Pokemon is that it doesn’t really get evolution right either.

But when some Christian organization gets wind of these possible beliefs, it will undoubtedly pump out a weak-ass version of Pokemon Go, call it Elijah Walks or some such biblically imitative hogwash, and foist it on unsuspecting Christian kids as God’s answer to the godless gaming community.

Then the arch-conservative Christian networks and Fox News (which is redundant) will pump out a free commercial for the Christian alternative to Pokemon Go. Then the 100M or so authoritarian-minded sweatheads who listen to the likes of Pat Robertson will think they’ve done some good, when in fact the only thing they ever reveal is a lack of comprehension that humanism is how the world actually works.

Perpetual battles

Christian of the sweatheads variety remain in a perpetual battle with rational Christians, who maintain that the Bible uses metaphors to represent the spiritual truths of God. “That’s how Jesus taught,” rational Christians contend. “So it’s the right way to think.” Such metaphors as the “tree of life” and the “river of life” can be trusted to withstand all scrutiny because they don’t treat the bible as a science textbook or a Christian gaming manual.

Christian conservative never seem to get the fact that Jesus is actually mocked by their lack of confidence in the verity of the metaphorical interpretations of scripture. Instead, faux Christian hypocrites always behave with the same fearful, selfish, shallow approach to every issue. That’s what a literal interpretation of the Bible or the Quran or the Torah always produce. Jesus railed against the scriptural literalists of his era, calling them hypocrites and a “brood of vipers,” thus proving that Jesus might have enjoyed playing a good game of Pokemon Go.

Conservative faith is instead perpetually afraid of its own irrational shadow, imagining Satan into existence through its own perverse interpretations of the bible. The Book of Revelation is an especially fertile field for this bit of conservative gamesmanship. That’s how we get predictions of the End Times and all that Left Behind stuff foisted on the world by the likes of Timothy LaHaye.

It all works by creating a tapestry of virtual fears, making some Christians believe in the imaginary boogeymen lurking in the real landscape of history. The reason Christians hate games like Pokemon Go is simple competitive jealousy. The fear-based messaging of the priests in Jesus’ day became the target of his criticism. But authoritarians in the modern era, just like the priests of old, still see themselves as having gotten things right. “Forget that weird prophet in the wilderness, or the one who ignores the rules given to us by God. He does not have truth on his side.”

It’s a game still being played to this day.

Virtual.Reality

In the meantime, Pokemon Go actually does represent the first Virtual.Reality iteration of the next generation. It stamps a virtual world onto the real world. And that’s a pretty novel approach.

It borrows from the geocaching trend from 15 years ago, in which families traipsed around parks looking for stashed cylinders and boxes. You had to use a GPS device to do that.

Now, thanks to the evolution of smartphones, that GPS stuff is all built into your  typical iPhone or Droid, which makes Pokemon Go the Google Maps of late teen and 20somethings tomfoolery. Whatever device you engage to go catch Pokemon, it all depends on the satellites we’ve thrown into space (with a ton of other space junk) to send Pokemon data into real places on earth where kids can go to “find” them. Hence: Virtual.Reality. I made that up, you know.

Where Pokemon cannot go

Lock on FencesBut there’s one place where Pokemon hunters cannot go. That would be your local high school track. Because over the last 15 years, running tracks have been turned into virtual prison facilities where only a small section of the public is allowed to go.

All those tax dollars the public spends on school facilities such as high school tracks are locked up behind tall, tall fences. Some of these fences stand twelve feet high and are made of tightly woven chain link so you can’t even get a toe grip and climb over.

We all understand the supposed reasons why schools are supposedly forced to lock up their track and field facilities. Vandalism on many public properties is a never-ending problem. We all know how complex the vandalism problem can be. Just look at the recent militia dustup with those property bandit ranchers and the damage they did to the wildlife refuge at Malheur in Oregon. Some selfish turds think they stand outside the law, and don’t answer to anyone. But despite their claims of acting for a higher purpose, they’re wrong. The same held true for Oliver North and his pack of bandits committing high crimes in the Iran-Contra affairs. There’s always someone claiming a higher purpose than the mundane affairs of government and the law, who don’t like fences if they stand in the way of their selfish interests. Ironically, many of these same people seem to want to build a wall all along the Mexican border. One might call that “reverse vandalism” of the nation’s best interests.

Track from aboveVandals rule

As for protecting high school tracks, I do specifically recall the year a pair of kids jumped the four-foot fence and dug a BMX dirt jump right in the center of the football field at Geneva High School. That was supremely stupid. But also rather typical of vandals as a whole.

Within a year, the school had erected eight-foot fences around the entire track and field complex, effectively blocking a community of runners from using the facility.

Years later, they also installed an artificial turf field. Such are the defenses against vandalism. Is our government right or wrong to commit such resources in these instances?

Having harmless fun 

Years ago a band of us bored with three weeks of education at a seminar in Irving, Texas decided to jump the gates at the Texas Rangers stadium and get onto the field to run around. It was fun. No harm done. But had we been caught, there surely would have been arrests made. And so it should be. Private property is just that. Private. No admittance except upon permission by the owners.

Yet there’s a wild side of my nature that resists such orders. Years ago my brothers and I frequently trespassed in a natural area to go birding. It was owned by a peat bog mining company at the time, and used in fall and winter by hunters. The property has long since been purchased by the county as an Illinois Nature Preserve along with thousands of acres around the main marsh. The public now owns the land. And as such, there are rules that govern the property, such as no ATVs or snowmobiles allowed. Surely that disappoints some potential users.

Litigation

Quite often public properties are focus for concerns about issues of litigiousness as well as damage. If someone gets hurt or dies on school property, for example, there is always a chance for a lawsuit. This is not a government problem, but quite the opposite. The selfishness of individuals who either don’t respect property or can’t take responsibility for the risks they take in life is what drives so many lawsuits.

Look through FencesSo there is a degree of irony in every chain link fence surrounding running tracks. Crawling over those fences is a risk unto itself.

Even when our local school created an eight- foot fence  around the track, I’d still climb over it because I lived a half away. I figured that I paid taxes and there was a right of some sort that went with that obligation. But had I fallen and broken my back? Well, some people might sue…

I’ve even read about thieves and robbers that have sued property owners because the intruders hurt themselves while breaking into a store or commercial property. My late father-in-law was vexed by the fact that some people who bought his hydraulic presses would take off the safety guards, resulting in the loss of limbs by machine operators. Those incidents brought lawsuits.

 

Pokemon Go risks

Me and High FenceIt’s long been said you can’t protect people from their own stupidity. And it’s just a matter of time before some kid with his face stuck to his phone walks into a busy street while playing Pokemon Go and gets nailed by a garbage truck. The headlines will scream, “POKEMON GO PLAYER DIES IN TRAFFIC.”

And that will be sad. And the family will probably sue the Pokemon company and try to get a million or two dollars for the loss of their son or daughter.

But there’s one place for sure where no kid will ever catch Pokemon. That would be the center of the infield of a high school track. The twelve-foot fences will never allow it. And that Pokemon is a crafty smart little bastard. How else would he ever kid those lazy ass kids off their couches to come find him?

Freedom to run

These days I run at a middle school track where there is no fence to block us from using it. Last year we were joined by a pair of sandhill cranes feeding on the infield. Something about training in the presence of those birds made it extra special. There is a pair of hawks that perches on the power line poles overlooking the track as well. Swallows of three different species dart over the infield. In spring one can hear chorus frogs singing in the ditches across the street. These are my Pokemon Go partners. I find them everywhere I go.

 

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Immodium did not quite lead to a podium

Gu SplatDays before the Lake Zurich Triathlon, I had not even registered for the race. There was a very good reason. The only races I was doing last week were to the bathroom to make it on time before calamity.

A few lessons have been learned this past two weeks about the importance of gut bacteria, and how it works within our bodies to regulate the kind of poop we pump out. For those of us with relative regular bowel schedules, these kinds of interruptions are a major disruption in how you look at life.

Oh, I know. There’s a whole world of people out there with far worse problems in their heinie functions than a little imbalance in their probiotic ratio. I respect all those dealing with this fine balance within our bodies. There are those who can’t seem to poop for crap, and wear tee shirts that say, “I pooped today!” And then there are those whose digestive systems have gone on permanent or semi-permanent strike.

There are lots of reasons why these things happen. But all you care about when it happens to you is how to fix it. So I went to the doctor (yes I did) and asked what to do. And tomorrow I find out if there’s a C-Diff thing going on.

In the meantime, I had a race to run. So I did the other thing the doctor told me to do and made the trip to Walgreen’s for a bottle of Immodium. I chose the mint because I thought it would taste better. And it tasted better in that way that things that are supposed to taste better but actually taste terrible tend to taste. Which is just shy of awful.

 

Panniecakes

I earned a post-race meal of pancakes and eggs. But the pancakes were so big I could only eat half of the first one. My gut was too full.

I’m not that sensitive about that kind of thing, so I choked down two sets of three teaspoons. That’s what the microscopic instructions said to do. And then I waited. An hour later my gut rumbled in the manner of distant thunder, and I thought something was going to blow. But you can’t run away from your own ass, so I stuck it through, had a couple short sessions on the pot, and that was that. The Immodium was working.

 

Only I think I overdid it a bit. Because we left at 4:00 in the morning and there was no urge to hit the bathroom before we left. That’s highly uncommon. Even at the race when I had plenty to time to hit the porta-potties, the Immodium would not give up that shit.

Which was rather the relief I was looking for. Because all last week the only thing I wiped more than my ass was philosophical tears from my eyes as the nation suffered yet another round of stupid murders by cops with guns and people with guns aiming at cops and still the trolls on Facebook claim that guns have nothing to do with gun violence.

I hate that shit. And I posted this article to explain the crappy neurosis that is driving this insanity in America. And then I made a vow to let it go a bit. Because frankly I felt awful for three whole days Thursday, Friday and Saturday. Exhausted and slightly feverish. Clearly my body was trying its hardest to work through what amounted to an infection of the bowel.

C-Diff can get serious. And I did not want to race if my body temperature was up. But the nurse took my temp and it was 98.6. “You don’t see that very often, actually,” she told me. And my blood pressure was 107/78. Pulse just under 60.

Yet I was so tired. Whenever I sat down to watch the Tour de France, my eyes slammed shut. Watching the Tour in that state is like a weird dream where Phil Ligget and Paul Sherwin are like characters from Alice in Wonderland. At one point I woke up to find Chris Froome racing downhill at 50+ mph. So I thought I was dreaming and went back to sleep.

However that was the real deal, and Froome built a lead that he isn’t likely to relinquish anywhere before Paris. Hell, he even punched an ignorant fan right in the face during the climb before his massively speedy descent.

 

Sue undt Chris

Post race smiles. Sue got second in her age group and I got fifth.

That was a bit inspiring. For the rest of the day I felt better. I took the bike out for a one hour spin and felt good. Even got some sprint practice in the drops in anticipation of the next day’s 15-mile racing speed.

 

So it was quite a turnaround to feel so damned good and happy this morning at the Lake Zurich triathlon. I was even excited for the swim.

Only I have never swum with so many swimmers around me before. This is just my second sprint triathlon after last year’s experiment. The Pleasant Prairie Sprint got converted to duathlon thanks to lightning. I did get in a 750 meter swim the day before, and it went smooth as silk.

That is now how the water feels with 200 other people around you in a shallow lake. Had I not known for sure there were no schools of piranha in the lake I might have sworn that I woke up in a B-Movie where herds of hapless villagers are pushed into dark Amazon waters where they are consumed like tuna steaks while the evil henchmen for an American oil company stand on the shore laughing their asses off that no one will live the tell the tale of their dark doings in the jungle.

Instead, I swam to the outside and out of the piranha chop and caught my breath. There was seaweed thick and clingy but that does not bother me. But it took me nearly 10 minutes to complete the 400 (plus the extra yardage I swam) so the performance was not that impressive.

I made up some good time on the bike. Only one cyclist passed me the entire 15 miles. I was passing people right and left, and I mean that literally.

Sue On PodiumThe run went just as well. I averaged 7:12 per mile without even knowing where we were going. Perhaps next time I’ll study up on that. Have a plan. But when your plan is just to get to the starting line without shitting your pants in some public place, the rest is not that important. The unstoppable Immodium Man plan was Plan A. Everything else was take it as it comes.

And that wrought a 5th place in my age group, which isn’t bad. The Immodium did not quite lead to the podium. I had the second fastest run time of the group. The third fastest bike time. 5th fastest swim. And one terrible transition after the swim that took 3:33. That was because I spent time praying in thanks to God that I did not fill my wetsuit with crap.

It was fun. That is what’s most important to me. My fiance Sue earned second place in her age group and a possible invitation to age group nationals in Omaha. I’m checking to see if they have an Immodium Division. Cause I would rock that.

 

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | 4 Comments

When it comes to biotics, stick with the pros

ProbioticsMost of life is dealing with the consequences of your own actions. You make a choice and deal with the results. Sometimes they are good. Sometimes, not so good.

One of the hard lessons of existence, given the collective tendency to fuck up royally as the human race,  is that it always pays to work with the pros. That’s because the amateurs don’t always know what they’re doing. That’s why they’re called amateurs. Not pros.

But I still trust some of my amateur friends for advice and guidance, at least to steer me in the general direction of doing something smart. And recently I was dealt a strange affliction known as cellulitis. It is an infection caused when staph germs get under your skin.

Cellulitis is just as bad as those situations when a co-worker gets under your skin. You know what that’s like. Dealing with a nasty co-worker builds dread of going to work each day because that aggressive asshole, whatever gender, is about to ruin your day.

I’ve had more than my share of dealing with nasty co-workers as well as some strange afflictions and affections. I once contracted a sliver that almost caused me to lose a finger. That was a ton of fun, a knock-me-out surgery and three weeks of intravenous antibiotics. And my finger is still slightly bent even after weeks of hand therapy. So I have learned not to mess around with infections of any kind.

So when I sensed something funky brewing in the back of my hand, I went to the Urgent Care Center. They took a look at the hand and prescribed powerful antibiotics to knock out the infection. This is a bit like pushing your annoying co-worker off the sixth story of your building. But let’s not tell anyone about that.

Because that would be a quick fix to the annoying co-worker problem. Cellulitis takes a bit longer to depose. In fact, I took antibiotics for three full weeks. Twice a day. Big ass horse pills. The infection subsided. Got reduced to a twinge. And finally, disappeared. And that’s what antibiotics can do. They kill bad germs.

But there’s one problem with antibiotics. They can also kill the good germs that help your body in important ways. We truly need the bacteria in our gut, to properly digest food and maintain a healthy bowel. If you kill off that bacteria, things get funky in a hurry.

That’s exactly what happened to my lower gastrointestinal tract. The antibiotics killed off the good germs in my lower-whatever and everything got loose and messy.

Protein.jpg

Now you may recall that we already discussed the fact that working with the pros is always important. But I do know some people who know a lot about this gut problem stuff, and asked them on Facebook if they knew how to handle a loosey-goosey gut. They all told me to take some probiotics. And some protein, perhaps, because it has the word “pro” in it.

Which is very different, you might say, from the amateur biotics. Those are pills that don’t know what the hell they’re doing. Rather than wind up in your gut, they’re likely to take a detour to your liver, and confuse the hell out of that organ. But as it turns out, the liver does help with digestion. Here’s what the Internets says about that, in short (grammar as it was posted): “In the human it is located in the upper right quadrant of the abdomen, below the diaphragm. The liver has a wide range of functions, including detoxification of various metabolites, protein synthesis, and the production of biochemicals necessary for digestion.”

Holy shit! Who knew? Well, it turns out you actually can find out some interesting stuff when working with amateurs. Like how vaccines cause autism, and how the human race never landed on the moon. Wait, those are the work of amateurs…

My other fear was that taking amateur biotics would let them head for my brain instead of my ass. That might produce some strange and dangerous thoughts, like the idea that it would be a good idea to elect Donald Trump as President, or that going into Iraq was a good idea even though George Bush the First called George Bush the Second and told him, “This is a very bad idea.” But what did George Bush the Second do? He impetuously slammed the phone down and went ahead with that shitty plan to invade a country full of people who already hate us, and the countries around them too. Nice job, Georgie Boy. Now we have ISIS to deal with. Which proves that terrible ideas often lead to terrorism of an entirely different level.

So I did not want any amateur biotics in my system. So I called the actual doctor (a pro, you see) and made an appointment. He listened to my story and read the information on his computer sent to him from Urgent Care. That’s how modern medicine works these days. You can’t go anywhere without a doctor knowing what you’re doing.

I was waiting for my doc to ask if I’d replenished my I-Pass when he brought up the topic of a condition called C-Diff. I’d already heard that term from a veterinarian friend of mine that weighed in on the subject on Facebook. We’re all just animals in the end, you see. C-Diff, he told me, is when your gut bacteria is out of balance and your shit turns to brown water.

And my actual doctor wanted to know something important about my shit. “Does it stink?” he asked. And I had to chuckle inside. “No, I’m a liberal,” I wanted to say. “My shit doesn’t stink.”

Pro PoopBut they sent me home with a plastic pan in which to shit, and I did that with rubber gloves covering my hands so that I could avoid contact with all those bad germs messing with my innards.

My doc told me to start taking probiotics right away. So I called up a friend that evening who sells probiotics, so she’s a pro of sorts. And the doc said I should work with the pros. “Get some good probiotics,” he counseled.

And my friend sells Shaklee,and I think that company sponsors a pro sports arena somewhere. So she doled out a bag of little round pills encased in three layers of acid-proof coating, which protects the probiotics until they can get down into your gut and colon. That’s just like the wedge pro football players use on kickoff returns. So I knew I was headed in the right direction on this shit.

But if they work from the throat down, it rather makes you wonder why you don’t just shove them ten inches up your ass and call it a day. But that would be an amateur move, you see. Because unless you’re a pro at that kind of thing, life can get messy in a hurry.

Pro Gloves.jpgThat also makes me wonder about people like Howard Stern, who pretty much does nothing on his show but talk about anal with his guests. And he’s one of the richest guys on the talent side of media. Which also makes you realize the real assholes all work on the ownership side. And that, my friends, cleanly explains the success of Donald Trump, who though he’s full of shit has gotten a complete pass from the media until recently. See, this shit all fits together in the end.

But I hope the probiotics start working fast, because I have a Sprint Triathlon to do this weekend, and I’d rather avoid the scene in which I shit my wetsuit or crap on the bike or let loose a barrage down my legs while clipping along on the 5K run.

See, it really did have something to do with swimming, riding and running. You have to trust me on these things. Cause I’m a pro.

 

 

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , | 3 Comments

When it comes to running shoes, we’ve all got history

IMG_6267.jpgEveryone in life has a history. And some of that history is baggage. Good baggage. Bad baggage. But baggage it is.

Some of that baggage is highly personal. Secrets you never want to reveal to anyone. Typically that’s the bad baggage.

But good baggage can be just as bad, in some respects. Like those letters from a former lover, secreted away in a photo album down in the basement. You know they’re there. You know what they say. You keep them hidden until you chance another glimpse at the writing that was once so precious. Those words. Those feelings. They never truly go away. They take you back to another day.

IMG_6263

For some of us the baggage we carry around stays out in the open. It’s called wearing your emotions on your sleeve. Or your feet.

And like a love affair, my involvement with running began at the tender age of twelve. That’s when I first felt that combination of pain and joy so familiar to those who run. It happened while being timed in a twelve-minute running test in gym class. That feeling was so personal and profound I almost did not dare tell anyone how it felt. That catharsis of self and release of fear and anger and pleasure all at once. A cleansing of the mind. It really was like love at first sight.

Some people tell me they hate running. And I get that. For some, it is no joy at all, but a burden. Like marrying for family reasons or money…when there is no love in the relationship. Some people run because they feel they have to do it. I both admire and pity them, just as one admires a person stuck in a difficult marriage. You wish the best for them.

When people blanch at the idea of running I always tell them that walking is just as good for them. But it isn’t running. It’s not what we experience in that sensation of rushing air and flirting with the edge of exhaustion.

Perhaps you’ve heard it said that good sex is often the product of conflict because the passions that result from a fight are more intense. But that’s also why people who love each other sometimes do fall into boring patterns in the bedroom. Too much trust can actually soften the heart, which gives up the notion that it has to try so hard. Comfort really can kill. But not always.

IMG_6266

It’s like that in running as well. When we fail to challenge ourselves the idea of going out the door can become boring. We fall into familiar patterns. Run the same pace. The same routes. Lose the joy of discovery.

Which is why a set of new shoes always shakes things up a little. At least the shoes on your feet look different. Feel different. They might even make you run a little different.

I’ve long lost count of the number of running shoes worn in 40+ years of running. It’s somewhere between 200 pairs and 500, I suppose. Yet I clearly recall that pair of Puma kangaroo-skin running spikes, circa 1971, doled out to me in freshman year cross country. And I recall those gum rubber flats for running on the asphalt around little Kaneland High School in the cornfields west of Chicago. Those shoes are burned into my brain like the slow dance I once with a rock-hard cheerleader during a high school dance. Oh. My. God.

And I also specifically recall my first pair of adidas running shoes. There was something about the three stripes on those shoes that screamed legitimacy. Perhaps it was those photos of European runners in issue after issue of Track & Field News. I longed to be that fast. Be that good. So many of those athletes wore adidas, the dominant brand of German track shoes. Sold in America. World class.

I wore a set of brushed suede blue adidas track spikes in high school track. They were sweet, sleek and dangerous with those 3/4″ spikes screwed into the bottom of the soles to race on cinder tracks. Then we took those spikes out and put in 1/4″ spikes to race on all-weather tracks. Indoor and outdoor. Then into the mud and scree of fall cross country.

We trained as well in adidas Italias. I’ve written about the glorious simplicity of those shoes, and how the running world has come full circle to the quiet functionality of the original adidas training flats.

The Italias had sister shoes in the adidas SL-72 and SL-76 training flats. The SL-72 was a classically simple adidas shoe issued during the Olympic year, built with a sole good for grass or concrete. Enough heel to do the job. They were followed by the much stiffer and less resilient SL-76. And from there, adidas went into a personality crisis of sorts. Their shoes got weird in some ways. Too hard in many models, or too narrow. Runners began adopted the ways of Nike and New Balance, Reebok and Saucony. The world exploded around the loyalties of those of us who loved the original adidas. It was like a sudden and implosive breakup.

IMG_6262Losing a first love like that is never easy. You don’t forget those feelings. Not when they helped form who you are. It’s true that high school girlfriends or boyfriends remain a part of your personality the rest of your life. You recall the fresh thrill of being liked or loved because it feels like nothing else you’ve ever experienced, or sometimes never experience again.

When I pull on a pair of adidas shoes, even a pair too broken down to use for training purposes, I still get that little rush of love that went with the originals. Those three stripes. The familiar angle of the adidas heel and sole. It’s not too sentimental to say that feeling with never, ever leave. It’s something to cherish no matter what other brands I choose to wear.

And there have been many. I got married in Nike Pegasus. Trained in Nikes all through college and beyond, including that summer in ’84 when I raced 24 times and won 12. Then came the settled years and New Balance trail shoes I threw on my feet because I was being purposely counterculture, hiding in the woods from competitive opportunities because life’s obligations were too many to allow heavy training. I was a running hipster.

OrthoticsNow I’ve emerged on the other side of Bell Curve and am simply enjoying the entire ride when it comes to running, riding and swimming. But when it came time to clear out some running shoes and give them back for recycling, I noticed a pair of gray adidas with sweet red soles. I pulled them out of the pile and put them through the wash. They’re a little hinchy in terms of support because I wore them out running, but the adidas still feel good on my feet and bring back all those happy memories of early days in running.

Call me a romantic if you will, or hopelessly lost in a running history that goes back farther than some of you reading this might even have been alive. But I say that life’s verve comes from a combination of dedication and desire. Older men can make great lovers, you know. We know how to tie the laces just right, or are willing to listen and learn.

There was once an urban legend that the word adidas actually stood for All Day I Dream About Sex. Well, it wasn’t true. What most athletes actually dreamed about in relation to adidas was somehow becoming world class. And it’s that pursuit of excellence and how it transfers to life that makes it all so interesting to consider exactly what we’re doing when we talk about having a love for the sport.

 

Posted in running, Uncategorized | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

It all comes down to gut instincts

RMKY_9275-X3At the end of a race, success or failure often comes down to whether you can will yourself to “gut it out.” That means going hard even when your stomach is in knots.

During peak racing years, my biggest concern was always managing gastrointestinal issues. Hard racing during that era meant 5:00-per-mile-pace. And that sometimes led to that feeling that I might barf. In fact, I did barf on occasion after races. Some of us are born with iron guts, but most are not.

That meant it was quite important to manage my food and fluid intake prior to races. I learned the hard way that it was not wise for me to eat much of anything within four hours of a race. I drank judiciously as well. I learned to avoid sweet fluids such as Gatorade during races or surely get nauseous. Sometimes I could taste what I just drank coming back up. So I knew it was being digested during the effort. So why drink it? I stuck to water.

Even the fluid intake days before the race could influence the outcome of a race. I made a rookie mistake once during the leadup to a 5000 meter race in the Illinois Prairie State Games. The carefree life in the dorms in the days before the race reminded me of college, and I ate and drank as I pleased, including too much Coca-Cola. Come race day, the weather turned hot and it was deadly trucking in the humidity too. I went through the first two miles in 9:30 when a nasty sidestitch forced me to stop. The caffeine and sweets in that Coke had not helped matters any. I’d not paid attention to the gut instincts that normally guard against such flaws.

Gutting it out

Beyond sidestitches, there were always bathroom needs to consider as well. Getting all that out of your system before the race begins is vital. Even having to pee when you’re going all out can interfere with concentration. Having to move your bowels can be far, far worse.

All athletes need to learn their weak spots in these categories of preparation. Testing the fluids you can tolerate before a big competition is important. There is no room for experimentation come race day. And the longer the event, the more critical this becomes. That’s why triathletes who do Ironman competitions and ultradistance races consult with nutritionists. It’s not just about nutrition. Gastrointestinal issues can force you to stop, lose time, or pull out of the race altogether.

These are all things we seek to control. Even the best-prepared athletes can get caught off guard by unexpected situations. Following a national steeplechase race, I indulged in some chain restaurant pizza for dinner. That night, food poisoning struck with a vengeance. I threw up 27 times and lost seven pounds off my 6’1.5″, 140 lb frame at the time. Seriously dehydrated, I begged the coach to take me to the hospital. They pumped me full of IV electrolytes to stabilize my system and cut down the fever. But I could well have died that day.

Gut bacteria

Featured Image -- 4823Recently I somehow developed cellulitis in my hand, perhaps from a small scratch. It spread across the back of my hand so I went to the Urgent Care Center and received a prescription for antibiotics. It took a couple weeks to knock out the hand infection, and I continued as instructed to complete the entire bottle of medication. Otherwise, infections can slip around the whack you give them and develop resistance. Then you have bigger problems.

During the late stages of the medication my stomach started acting up and my bowel movements got thin and frequent. Weeks later I am still dealing with this pattern. So I called the doctor and scheduled an appointment. My gut bacteria must be seriously disturbed as well. I’m even concerned about the ability to race in the upcoming sprint triathlon scheduled for this weekend. The last one went fine at Pleasant Prairie. No bathroom issues there. But one can’t be too careful.

So I’m planning to get some probiotics and drink tons of water. Time to flush out the bad gut bacteria and replace it with good gut stuff. That’s the tarsnake of gut issues. Bacteria keeps you together but it can also take you down.

See, it takes guts to admit when something’s not right. You can’t always will your way out of a disturbance in the gut or anything else on your body. It pays to get help. So that when the time really comes to gut it out in the race, you’re not starting out halfway behind. It all comes down to gut instincts.

 

 

 

Posted in running, triathlete, triathlon, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Thanks, partner(s)

 

Groupie of Chris Jada Russ Sue.jpg

Running and cycling and swimming partners Christopher Cudworth, Jada Hambry-Butler, Russ Bautch and Suzanne Astra. We spent a weekend training in Wisconsin. And ate and drank a bit too. 

Training partners can be the difference between success and something much less satisfying. A good training partner does two things: they can push you to run harder and can also exert common sense on your routine.

 

Last Sunday morning while on a weekend training trip with our friends Russ and Jada in Wisconsin, we planned a one-hour run through the Pheasant Branch Conservancy, a beautiful nature preserve with running trails in Middleton, Wisconsin.

We all ran four miles together and then the two gals split off to complete their six-mile run while Russ and I set off for another three-mile loop.

I was feeling really great and warmed up well, so I picked up the pace. Russ barely missed qualifying for the Boston Marathon last fall in the Fox Valley Marathon. He ran in the low 3:00 range and missed by only 20 seconds due to some late-stage calf cramps.

He’s also a finisher in Ironman Wisconsin in the mid-13 hour range if I recall correctly, so the guy has endurance. That meant he didn’t mind my one-stepping him on the quicker loop we ran together. I apologized later if it was annoying, but I really wanted to see what energy I had in the tank.

Pick it up

We climbed the first turn that skirts the prairie kame where giant oaks sit atop what is likely a pile of gravel laid down by the last glacier. Then the trail turns toward the woods and rolls along. We dropped from 9:00 to 8:00 and finally mid-7:30 pace. It absolutely felt good to run. But it also felt good to run with a training partner at essentially my racing pace for the second half of a duathlon.

Granted, 7:30 pace used to be slow for me even in warmups. I could not help thinking about that while on that loop that I could once race along at 5:30 pace in training. It’s so strange that ability disappears with age. Like ghosts from the past.

Current aims

Russ is a bit younger than me, and as mentioned, training for another Boston qualifying race this fall. He told me he was cruising along thinking about how our Sunday run applies to his future. “It’s hard to imagine doing that pace for 26 miles,” he said. Yet that’s how you begin to imagine it. By doing it on a consistent basis. So perhaps we could help each other…

Proving that different aims and stages in an athletic career do not mean that training partners cannot sync up and run together. In fact, I was feeling so good on Sunday it was tempting to dial it all the way down to 7:00 pace and give it a real run the last half mile. But we’d ridden 60 miles the day before in hilly terrain and that began to show in my legs during the last mile of the run.

Satisfaction

There were moments during that run on Sunday when the supreme satisfaction of running well with others hit home with me. I find it so satisfying to train with gals on many occasions. Having seen the literal start of the women’s running boom in the mid-1970s, I know how far women have come in training. The majority of runners on the trail last Sunday were, in fact, women. You go, gals.

In fact Jada is coming off a year in which injury kept her from running much at all. She worked hard in therapy and at some point along the way a bothersome, painful ligament fell back into line. She began to run slowly a mile at a time. Now she’s rebuilding fitness and imagining where it will take her next.

Likewise, Sue has been bothered by some hip issues and doing a combination of strength work at the gym, some chiro and other strategies. She’s also focusing on shorter races this year to rebuild her speed on the run. And it’s working.

And the running I did on Sunday with Russ reminded me so much of college and post-collegiate training runs with trusted training partners. Russ and I challenged each other in that unspoken dialogue that only occurs through breathing and the skritch of feet on a dirty trail. It was a joy indeed. Of course I was kind of sore on Monday. But that’s the price you pay.

Because, as we bounced along the boardwalk through the woods where the wetlands seep into the soil, birds were singing and time stood still.

That’s why I still run to this day. I’m sure you know the feeling.

WRARNewLogo

 

Posted in running, Uncategorized | Tagged , | 1 Comment

Why your training (and thinking) must evolve

Cleveland.BigBlueBirdThe notion of fitness is a key element of the theory of evolution. In nature, being fit for life means having the ability to survive. There are trillions of examples of this principle in operation every day. Evolution through time has delivered enormously complex organs, behaviors, and relationships that govern how species develop and survive.

Human beings generally fancy themselves a unique product of evolution. Our brains enable us to conceptualize the very processes by which we live and die. This cognizance is highly prized in endeavors such as business, politics and religion.

Abstractions

It is also a necessary tool in pursuit of abstract pursuits such as sports. We invent games and contests for ourselves that measure or demonstrate our relative state of fitness. That is why the Olympic Games were originally invented, as a means to display the height of human physical endeavor. “Athletics” is originally the term used for events in track and field, but the term has expanded to include all types of sports.

IMG_7311For those who run, ride and swim, the ideal preparation for these events involves considerable training. This is because building endurance requires what we might call “chemical rehearsal.” With every movement we make, chemical reactions are taking place deep within our muscles and circulatory systems. We’re not simply a coat of armor marching around in the event we are challenged.

These internal processes are quite elemental. They were formulated in the most basic life forms and ultimately adapted (and adopted) into more complex functions. The trial and error necessary to make these processes work h have taken billions of years.

But consider the basic fact that, according to LiveScience.com: “The system of blood vessels in the human body measure about 60,000 miles (96,560 kilometers). Arteries carry oxygen-rich blood from the heart through the body. Veins carry oxygen-poor blood back to the heart.”

Mind-boggling statistics such as that make people doubt the ability of nature and evolution to create such a miraculous, complex machine as the human body. Citing credulity on the part of people who trust science to such explanations, some doubters claim evolution is incapable of producing mechanisms such as the human eye.

The meaning of The Word

Often these cynics toward science and evolution (such as the inimitable Rush Limbaugh) prefer to credit God or some euphemistic Intelligent Designer as the inventor of all creation. Their case on behalf of religion often goes all the way back to a literal interpretation of the Book of Genesis and a supposed process of creation that took just seven 24-hour days. From there the extrapolations include a narrow view of time that suggests the Earth itself is only 6-10,000 years old. That leaves little or no time for evolutionary processes to occur, so they write them off as an invention of the human mind. A sin, even.

Florida SkyThe trouble with these ostensibly Christian objections to the theory of evolution is that Jesus himself would never have abided in them. Jesus taught using parables founded in highly organic symbolism, and was thus a naturalist before there was such a thing. His symbolic use of images from nature to teach spiritual principles is called metonymy, the use of the characters of one object from nature to describe the attributes of another.

The Bible is rife with metonymy from beginning to end. We could not read the book or understand a single concept about God without this metaphorical tool. Instead we get reports of God appearing as a mighty wind or the flames in a burning bush. God chooses not to be revealed directly interacting with the human race except through Christ and a few other representatives. The argument about how that process ultimately works is vexing the world to this day. But almost always, it is the literal interpretation of scripture that causes the most problems. About that habit Jesus chastised the religious leaders of his own day, calling them hypocrites and a “brood of vipers” (note the metaphor) for turning scripture into law as a means to control other human beings.

It’s really quite a simple, ugly and unchanging fact of human nature if you break it all down. Religion without metaphor is nothing more than a means to control other people.

Genetic traces

The solution to all these arguments can ironically be found in our genetics. For starters, the human race is all one species. There is no person on earth who by definition of our origins is better than the other. That scientific fact aligns so closely with the claims of Jesus one can only gawk at how stupid it really is to deny evolution in terms of human understanding.

Frank ShorterAnd to that effect, every race of human being constitutes mere variations on a single species, homo sapiens, that has developed differences in appearance in response to specific climactic environments and other forces of nature. Yet for all this diversity, human beings from each of these variations can definitely breed.

But let’s be clear: human beings cannot (or do not) effectively mate with other ape species because we are not evolved for that capacity. The outcomes of any such breeding (program) would not be fit for survival. The physical and mental attributes of inter-species breeding would be confused and under any biological pressure would not survive. That’s how evolution works. It’s quite merciless, and that is why books such as the Bible contain prohibitions against it. That includes bans against breeding with our own relatives, because breeding with people whose DNA is too close to our own can produce undesirable physical and mental defects. So the Bible acknowledges the workings of genetics. Not all genetic variation and specificity has desirable outcomes.

When new species do evolve in nature it is typically when groups of individuals become isolated from other populations. This combination of genetic variation and pursuant survivability is the natural laboratory in which evolution occurs. That’s why seemingly backward evolutionary adaptations can occur as well. Flightless cormorants on the Galapagos islands no longer needed to fly in order to survive. They swam to catch their food instead, and with no other natural predators to take them out, the birds slowly lost use of their wings for purposes of escape. Evolution has a sense of humor, you might say. And it doesn’t work in one simple direction.

Human traits

Yet we still share 95% of our DNA with our closest ape ancestors. This proves that at some point we had a common ancestor. Human beings diverged in one direction while apes like chimpanzees evolved in another. Our human ancestors wandered out on the savannah and began to walk erect by necessity. This opened up all sorts of other capacities, such as carrying objects while walking and ultimately that led to tool-using and other adaptations that pushed and pulled the descendant line of apes that developed into human beings in entirely new directions.

Monkeying with fitness

So we did not “come from monkeys” as is unpopularly supposed by those who object to the theory of evolution. We descended from a branch of bipedal apes, some of which succeeded in evolutionary history, while others did not.

If you’re paying attention, you begin to see the clear parallels between evolution and sport. It only makes sense that certain people are better adapted to endurance sports than oYoga girlthers. Some possess better capacities to process oxygen or have hearts that pump blood more efficiently to the muscles. They have an evolutionary advantage, in other words, that predisposes them to success in human sports.

That is not to say that improvement cannot be achieved through training and perseverance. One of the things we love about sports is the champion that has worked the hardest to achieve their goals. They may overcome physical shortcomings through persistence and training.

But that means considerable thought and willpower must be applied to that training in order to gain maximal effects. Entire theories of sports training have evolved as a result. Back in the 1970s the theory of Long Slow Distance (LSD) dominating running. Its proponent Arthur Lydiard trained his athletes using long runs and up to 200 miles or running per week to build endurance. This endurance base was then honed through speedwork and hills.

Speed thrills

Yet other coaches took the shorter route. Brooks Johnson at Stanford trained a 5000-meter runner named Doug Padilla to race using primarily speedwork, seldom more than 30 miles per week. Similarly, the likes of middle distance runner Sebastian Coe incorporated plyometrics and strength work to enhance speed over short distances. Coe broke the world record in both the 800 and 1500 meters during the height of his reign. He was trained by his father, who evolved the system of strength training and running to create a close to perfect running machine.

Yet even Seb Coe had his evolutionary flaws. These included flat feet, for which the athlete wore orthotics to train and compete in order to avoid injury from that biomechanical flaw.

These examples tell us that every athlete has to work with the mechanics of evolution while simultaneously compensating for individual shortfalls.

Evolving your training

Cleveland.GiantDuckThe practical application of all this theory also suggests that your training must evolve over time. Changes in physical ability from ages 12-24 are profound. Athletes gain strength and endurance during these years as they reach maturity. Maximizing endurance from ages 24-34 is the goal, when most athletes reach their peak.

Using that physical base and mental acuity gained from competition allows many athletes to success from the ages of 34-40. We call that “experience” but really what we’re talking about is an evolved ability to understand our mental and physical response under many conditions. That’s how older athletes such as Meb Kefleghzi are able to out-compete runners 10-15 years younger. Only by learning to love and accept our physical limitations can we actually learn to exceed them.

Beyond 40

RJCR_4483-X2 (1)Beyond the age of 40, an athlete’s training absolutely must evolve in response to physiological changes occurring within the body. The human body loses some of its ability to recover from stress as we age. Our systems literally begin to wear out past the age of 40. This also mocks the idea that human beings once lived 600-800 years. Evolution defies any such claims on simple grounds that animal flesh simply burns out with time.

Taking an oral myth and turning it into a supposed truth does nothing to defy these facts. It only proves the lengths to which human beings will go to deceive themselves toward ideas of immortality. It’s fine to lionize the characters in the Bible as primal examples of human virtue and perpetuity but we don’t need to turn them into demi-gods to prove the point that some people are exceptional. The human body is miraculous enough on its own without exaggerating our potential to some unreachable ideal. That’s just foolishness.

Definition of insanity

As for us “everyday” human beings, it makes no sense to do the same exact training from one year to the next. Everything from weather to diet and even cultural or financial stress can affect an athlete’s ability to train and perform. The idea that one’s training should be the same for five or ten years in a row is patently absurd.

Rupp and MebYes, there are some formulas for success, and good coaches abide by them. But great coaches also know how to adapt training to the athlete’s ability to respond. If something is not working, then an alternative must be found. This is especially true in response to the inevitable injuries that occur as a result of physical stress on the body from training. Plowing ahead when injury or illness catches up to an athlete is insane.

The effects of a set type of training can also wear off. Athletes learn to “game the system” over time, with perceived effort compromised by the ability to hold back and avoid pain or discomfort. That’s why variability is important in training. The human body and mind is not a machine. It does not always perform on demand, nor does it always benefit from rote repetition.

Evolution in real time

That means as we age and mature as athletes, it is often important to create circumstances in which we test ourselves in new ways. The flipside is that we must also learn to accept the need to recover more, to add rest days and possibly take a longer view of progress than we did as very young athletes.

In other words, our training must evolve. It helps to understand that every step we take is an evolution in our being. That’s why devices such as FitBit are becoming so popular. They give us empiric feedback on the tiny chemical reactions brought on by simple acts such as walking. This is evolution taking place in real time.

The evolutionary game

 

lanceOf course, there are always those who want to game the process of evolution. That’s where practices such as using steroids, doping or blood infusion for endurance athletes enter the picture. When Lance Armstrong convinced his entire cycling team to engage in use of EPO, his doctor was simply applying drugs invented to help cancer patients maintain healthy blood oxygen levels to enhance athlete performance. The same held true with blood-doping, the extraction and reinfusion of blood into an athlete’s circulatory system. None of these methods would work without a complex understanding of the evolutionary processes behind athletic performance. The basic premise of the program was to help athletes exceed the body’s native capacity to produce blood and process oxygen. In other words, the goal was to become superhuman.

The future of athletic performance may, in fact, be genetic engineering. That holds potential to bring out aspects of human performance through gene guidance and selection. That’s where the world of evolution and human performance begins to get really murky.

And that’s when it may well help to have a Bible or Quran or another holy book in hand when we consider the meaning of such evolutionary changes, not just the mechanisms. That’s what the Bible was always intended to do: function as a guide for our morality, but not as a science book.

SEEK JUSTICE. SHOW RESPECT. LOVE LIFE.

WRARShirtGraphic

 

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

Explaining the lure of triathlon to someone who doesn’t

RECE11797-X2From the outside looking in, the sport of triathlon certainly looks insane. Magic Marker numbers scrawled on bare skin. Tight racing suits, radical sunglasses and a strange variety of hats and helmets. Bikes that look more like wine bottle openers than bicycles. Wetsuits that make everyone look like a beached seal or a giant black licorice stick. All while sweat or water is pouring down faces and other body parts. What’s this all about, really?

When the sport was first popularized in the early 80s it quickly gained a reputation for attracting extreme athletes. Then came massive TV broadcasts in which athletes actually shit themselves coming into the finish line. That confirmed the craziness for many outside the sport.

Yet people tuned in because of that craziness. The limits of human endurance are somehow always fascinating. It can be a bit of a freak show. From the outside looking in, the sport of triathlon looks a bit like chaos.

But a perspective from inside the sport says something different. The craziness is more about being organized than in succumbing to chaos. The entire point of the triathlon is to control the chaos and proceed through transitions in a fashion that is both intelligent and efficient. Minutes in overall time can be saved simply by knowing how to place your gear and swapping it all in order. Explaining this to other people takes some doing.

PP Sue NumbersThat conversation

We’ve all experienced conversations at summer parties where the sport of triathlon comes up. “I can’t even run,” someone might observe. “I don’t know how you do all that.”

The response is that you don’t typically “do all that” until actual race day. Instead, the sport remains a practice of three-part harmony until you combine them. Yes, there are “brick runs” to do coming off the bike. That helps you learn the feel of running with cycling legs. It is these moments, you could explain, that make the sport so interesting. Because the same goes for getting on the bike after the swim.

But first, you have to explain the sensations of swimming in open water, with no constraints or walls to touch. All triathletes must practice that type of swimming, and learn what it’s like to tip your head up just above the surface to read where other swimmers are located and how to site for the buoys. It’s a strange and marvelous freedom, you might explain, to be swimming in such open circumstances. Yet it takes self-control.

RAPS_3962-X2

Switching from the grips to the drops on a road bike. The next phase is tri-bars. That’s coming this week.

That trot between the water and the bike transition area is also a strange world. It makes you feel like an entirely different creature on earth, like a monster from the Black Lagoon. Then you start to strip off your monster skin as you emerge from cold water onto dry land. That wetsuit keeps you warm in water conditions that might otherwise stop you cold. But you can’t wear that suit on your bike, so you strip as you go, then suit up for the cycling portion and gingerly trot out the gates because you’re now wearing shoes with cleats on the toes that are far worse than high heels when it comes to running in them.

That position

It might then help to explain why triathletes ride so flat on the profile of their bikes. It’s aerodynamics, plain and simple. The position far forward makes it easier to cut through air and better to pedal long distances. That position is almost like running on the bike. And sure, hills suck in that position, but it’s an ultimate tradeoff.

The trick during the bike phase is to ride hard enough to get a good bike time yet still save enough to get off the bike and run. This takes trial and error, and practice, but it is the crux of the sport to use both your mind and body to race well.

That running thing

When the run finally comes along, those first few steps can be brutal as your legs change from the cadence of the bike to the running motion. But this is where character comes in. Running when you’re already tired takes concentration. It can help to use the same tempo or cadence on the run that you were doing on the bike. The mind and body work together in strange ways.

PP Sue CalfAll about the calves

That is what the sport of triathlon is all about. That and reading the numbers on the calves of other cyclists and runners as you compete. Because those numbers indicate age group categories. Passing other competitors is the name of the game. In the swim, you typically don’t know who’s who, except for the color of their caps. That indicates which “wave” a competitor was allotted. That’s how racers are coded in the swim portions.

After that, it’s all about the calves.

When you enter the final mile and realize you’ve covered the distance to the best of your ability that day, there is a sense of accomplishment in the sport of triathlon. It stimulates the mind and challenges the body. All the strangeness in gear and appearance and cultlike tribalism means not a thing. You’re a person that is challenging self-perceptions. In fact, you’re one of many people doing the same. So no matter what others may think of your strange sport, it is a satisfying way to refine your self-worth and share an intense experience with others.

That is the sport of triathlon explained to those who might be curious, and to those still trying to figure out why the hell they do it.

BE ORIGINAL. TRAIN HARD. COMPETE WELL.

WRARShirtGraphic

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Competing in the land of Jelly Belly

PP TransitionThe pleasant little town of Pleasant Prairie, Wisconsin is located just south of Kenosha along Lake Michigan. The triathlon conducted out of the RecPlex has gotten a deserved reputation as a great race. Reports from years past indicate the parking situation is much improved. Everything from registration to transition is within a nicely confined area.

Even the race delay proved tolerable as thunderstorms swept from the southwest over the edge of Pleasant Prairie. Race directors moved everyone inside to safety out of the rain and threat of lightning. There is nothing more talkative than 2500 triathletes and their friends confined inside a gymnasium. The whole affair felt a bit like a party with a few short naps thrown in.

 

PP Clicking In

Clicking in at the start of the bike. 

But when the rain relented and all those athletes and friends gathered outside along the lake, the sad announcement came that lightning was still within six miles of the start. So the race was changed to a duathlon for everyone. The worst result of that decision was mixed emotions on the part of those who excel in swimming. And who dislike running.

 

Instantly the International distance race became 8.5 miles of running total. The Sprint got off much easier, with only 5.4 total. But that’s still not really a sprint, now is it?

Most competitors raved instead about the new bike course. It utilized a couple overpasses as hills, and found the only other hills in the area out on the far reaches. The quick loop hrough a residential neighborhood was far better than those painful u-turns so many races concoct. And competitors in the International reported a stretch where speeds of 28-30 were quite possible, if not demanded of the riders.

RJCR_4483-X2 (1)As a triathlete from a running background, and then cycling, the duathlon has been a staple of racing for me the last couple years. But having done the pre-race swim the day before the race, I was disappointed not to get the chance to swim in true open water for the race.

And then I had to wait around for Wave 19 to take off. My fiance had already been on the course for an hour and a half when my race started. That meant we saw each other when I was on the second run and she was two miles into her second one as well. She looked good, and was smiling. That made me happy.

But there was business to attend to. At around that point in my race a fellow who was potentially in my age category (I misunderstood Waves vs. Age Group) showed up next to me at 1.5 miles out of 3.1. We ran together for half a mile and then I decided that it was not going to come down to a sprint. So I chose a spot ahead where the orange cones pointed us back on the running trail from the road and threw in a 15-meter surge. That was all it took to separate us. As is often the case, that tempo became my standard from there on in.

RMKY_9275-X3So it felt good to be competing. Again. I do these events with a bit of a chill attitude, I must admit. Getting all nervous doesn’t really help much. But I will admit to some pre-race yawns. Echoes of competitive days of yore. I finished second in my age group and 21st overall.

I finished second in my age group and 21st overall. Not bad for a guy still working on the Jelly Belly accumulated from a love of sweets. In fact, we toured the Jelly Belly factory just down the road from the RecPlex. Picked up some Sport Beans and a couple small treats. We did not go nuts.

As a souvenir and to replace the worn out ball caps lying around my house, I purchased two different Jelly Belly caps to wear around this summer. There’s nothing happier than the thought of Jelly Belly jelly beans. So there’s that. But there’s also a hidden reminder that my own jelly belly needs to go away. A cap with a Jelly Belly logo is a good way to go.

WRARShirtGraphic

 

Posted in triathlete, triathlon, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment