Metaphysical observations over a beer in July

By Christopher Cudworth

BeerWhile waiting for a birthday party to begin at an eatery in downtown Naperville, Illinois, I ordered a beer at the outdoor bar. My vantage point was pleasant, sitting at the corner of a marble-topped bar with just enough view of the other patrons to make things interesting if the wait got long.

I had the laptop propped on the bar to once-again proof the manuscript for my book The Right Kind of Pride. Today the first printed proof version is supposed to arrive in the mail. There are always a few glitches that pop up during file conversion and those are the responsibility of the author and publisher to find. That’s the obligation. To readers these glitches are a distraction. They undermine the quality of the manuscript as a whole.

But there is no such thing as perfection in the human realm.

So much of life is like that. We present our best faces to the world, but our flaws still pop through. So we edit, and we revise. We gain weight. We lose weight. We run and ride and swim and attempt to fix our form and write our own active story of better performance and hopefully, a better person is the result.

So much philosophy mixed with the physical. The things we do like running and riding almost exist in the metaphysical. But let’s define that:

Metaphysical: 

a: concerned with abstract thought or subjects, as existence, causality, or truth. 

b: concerned with first principles and ultimate grounds, as being, time or substance. 

Yes, that’s it precisely, isn’t it? Running and riding and swimming truly are metaphysical acts. We draw greater significance from them. They are not mere acts, but meta-acts.

We live in a near Meta culture. The movies we watch now flirt with the idea that everything is an abstraction. Even an abstraction upon an abstraction. The song Reflektor by Arcade Fire captures that notion.

This-Is-the-End-Michael-CeraThe recent Meta-flick This Is the End starring Seth Rogan, Jonah Hill and James Franco (to name a few) addresses the idea that modern movie actors are a Meta commentary on the act of acting itself. When the characters in the movie lampoon their own acting careers, the audience is in on the joke. We laugh at Michael Cera being harpooned by a streetlamp because his career is obviously at the end of that long arc where he played a certain kind of character over and over again. His innocence is skewered and we watch him gored by the power of the devil himself. That’s a very Meta moment.

We’re all Meta characters in some sense. The person we are now may not be the person we will be in an hour, a week or a year. Soon enough we’re gone entirely. Our memories remain.

Which is why living in the moment is both so important and so difficult. We crank those pedals and measure our cadence and get home to look at the cyclometer or Strava and sum it all up with empiric data. And yet still we ask: What the hell did I just do? What does it matter? Did I just run 8 miles? Swim a mile? Other than the fact you are tired, you can hardly tell sometimes.

BarThese are things to contemplate while drinking a beer or two or three at an outdoor eatery on a Monday afternoon in the middle of eternity.

It’s been an interesting year working for myself and working on the book and trying to sum up a shitload of things that have happened. It’s hard to even call any of them Good or Bad. They just are. I’m just here. So is everyone. Anyone. All of us. Meta People.

We are concerned with First Principles and Ultimate Grounds. What is the metaphysical’s role in defining who we are? Our first principles may be that we run or ride or swim. That’s the only way to cut through the crap. Pull back the veil. Feel and be.

These activities actually exist outside the bubble of abstract pursuits for money or success or whatever measurements society uses to measure its respective cultural values. Some chase religion or God and come home screaming that they’ve won. Salvation. Hope. The Lottery.

Meanwhile other people are so convinced they know the mind of God they are literally heaving bombs at each other from every angle. Others are packing weapons in defiance of the Christian tradition of turning the other cheek. They conceal their ugliest, fearful motives instead, just in case they get into a situation where someone else might shoot at them.

It’s like denying the calculated and calibrated intent of the Rhythm Method while simultaneously denying women the right to use real birth control. One tries to justify fucking for pleasure within the confines of religion while the other actually makes it possible. The intent is the same. It’s only the method that’s different. Metaphysical sex. First principles. Ultimate grounds. Hypocritical.

These are all pre-emptive attempts at breaking down the cultural abstract. People tricking themselves into feverish philosophies, then hiding Cadillac Gutbehind Meta bullets and Meta bombs.

They drive Meta vehicles too, proudly ramping their Escalades down the boulevard as if that makes them somehow better for owning them. They view themselves as existing uphill from everyone else without recognizing that going downhill is not that impressive a feat. Everyone can do that. It doesn’t matter if you do it in style or not. In the end, you can’t take it with you.

The potential abstractions grow so thick they become like giant gnats against which the hand swishing in front of our faces feels like the windshield wiper of our soul. The words mix. You Meta boy. You Meta girl. You Meta person that could help you in business. You Meta person that could change your life. You Meta friend for a long ride or a long run.

IMG_0215And then you look down and see your own reflection in the lens of your sunglasses, and you sip your beer and look around one more time to see if the people you are supposed to meet for the birthday party have arrived as yet. And you wave, and they wave back. You put on your sunglasses and carry your beer to the table you’ll occupy. And the Meta moment shifts. The abstractions have to wait for a moment, or an hour, or until the next time you sit with a beer at a bar with light clouds floating over head.

And you think, “How far should I go tomorrow? The weather’s supposed to be good.”

Earlier in the day you rode through two different rainstorms. You wondered if they meant a damn thing. Was there something metaphysical you were supposed to learn from coming through the rain. It hurt when it hit. The white lines were slippery and the tarsnakes obscured. But you rode and you rode. And then the sun came out again. It really did. Through sunglasses the world looked amber and sweet.

Downright metaphysical.

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What stopping for a patch of glass can teach you about cycling and running

By Christopher Cudworth

In the middle of a 30 mile ride I was cruising the road shoulder in Elburn, Illinois to allow the big truck traffic on Route 47 through the center of town to safely pass by on my left.

Just across the tracks in town the shoulder glimmered with broken glass. I hit the brakes but not soon enough. My bike tires crunkled and crinkled across the glass. So I stopped, gently turning the wheels under the touch of my cycling glove to remove any potential glass shards from my wheels.

I was swearing loudly about glass on the road when a voice from the other road shoulder reached me between the noise of the trucks. “Do you need a tube?”

A fellow with a landscaping getup was calling out to me from across the road.

“No, I think I got it.”

But his interest sparked mine. So I pushed my bike across the street to thank him. And he asked, “How often do you ride along Route 47? Very far?”

I explained that part of one of my main training routes, a 20-mile route that loops from Batavia out to Elburn and back does indeed us the road shoulder along Route 47.

“Is it safe?” he asked.

What a loaded question. No roads are absolutely safe. The shoulder on Route 47 is about 8 feet wide. So I ride it and keep an ear open for big trucks. There usually isn’t much debris even though the road is heavily traveled.

“I got T-boned,” the landscape guy explained to me. Then he pointed to his lower leg and began to explain the plates, screws and multiple surgeries required to piece his shattered lower leg together. The limb was thicker than it should be, like a wooden peg. “It took 8 surgeries,” he told me.

I winced and told him how sorry I was that it happened to him.

“It on Keslinger at Pouley Road,” he explained. “A 16-year-old kid accelerated across the road and hit me square. I flipped up on the hood.”

Bad luck. Dumb luck. Sucky odds. You can call it anything you want. The fact is we’re all exposed to the inattention, aggression or distraction of motorized vehicle drivers. Of course I didn’t require some driver to knock me cold. I ran into a downed tree on a bike path. Did it all on my own.

But the conversation continued with my newfound cycling friend explaining that he now uses front and rear lights even in daylight.

“I like the white flashing light on the front. Even in shadows you can be seen,” he explained.

As I rode away into yet another rainstorm it struck me that safety is a perpetual pursuit. In the end, it’s really the only thing any of us chasing.

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Cid Carver finds peace and family through the triathlon community in Israel

Cid Carver, triathlete in Israel

Cid Carver, triathlete in Israel

By Christopher Cudworth

Cid Carver is originally from northeast Ohio where her interests in sports and international politics were perhaps innocent and marginal at best. 

Finding her place in the world

It was only after she moved to her adopted country of Israel several years ago that both of those interests grew and converged. “I’m Jewish by heritage,” she explains. “But not by practice. Funny story, I came here on this 10 day free trip that Jews can do between 18 – 26 years old. It’s called Birth Right. I had no connection with the country. I didn’t know Hebrew or anyone here. But after 10 days I made my decision to live here forever. I loved it here and wanted to stay. So I got citizenship after two months of being here without going back to the US. Eventually I did return for my clothes, etc. Now I do go back once a year.”

Making triathlon connections

Training on roads among rugged Israeli hills

Training on roads among rugged Israeli hills

Carver was not a triathlete when she arrived in Israel. But as she experimented in the sport her love of movement and a new sense of place combined to form both a bond with her location and the community of athletes it hosts.

“Athletes are athletes, and when you are on the bike or in the pool or at an ultimate frisbee tournament, it’s about training together and being judged by your abilities and not by where you are from.”

Bombs away

But recently one of the challenges of training in her adopted country is the challenge of missiles literally falling from the sky. In July 2014, the group known as Hamas, a Palestinian Sunni Islamist organization with an associated military wing, the Izz ad-Din al-Qassam Brigades, has been heavily on the attack. The group regularly fires rockets at major cities trying to disrupt the Israeli state any way they can. 

Swimming, cycling and running make up part of every day

Swimming, cycling and running make up part of every day

Many of those missiles do not get through. Most in fact are intercepted by the defense system known as the Iron Dome. According to MSN.com, the mobile missile defense system is “designed to fire guided missiles at rockets that threaten to hit populated areas while ignoring others.” The Iron Dome is partly funded by American money and has recently reported a 90% success rate in taking out rockets launched by Hamas. 

The few missiles that hit cities such as Tel Aviv still cause disruption in the daily life of Israel. People in several cities have been injured by Hamas rocket fire. Israel has returned fire on Hamas targets including known homes of Hamas operatives. Hamas in return claims that innocent civilians have been killed. And so it goes. On Monday, July 14, 2014 it was reported in the Chicago Tribune that 17,000 residents of Gaza fled their homes as Israel conducted a campaign to level suspected strongholds of Hamas militants. 

The violence appears ready to escalate with each new strike. And as always, the international community struggles to contain such longstanding conflicts. 

Training on the seashore

Training on the seashore

Keep calm and carry on

Trying to carry on with daily life is interesting enough. Add in something as wide-ranging as training for a triathlon and one can see why some people adopt the attitude Cid Carver describes as “living in the bubble.” 

“People simply believe that we won’t be touched. It’s because we are less affected by it here in Tel Avi. But there are rockets being launched at us about every thirty minutes. So the pressure is always there. In Ber Sheva, Ashdod and the other cities in the south, they are getting hit year round. The rockets never stop in cities closer to Gaza. It’s just now they have bigger ones that can reach Tel Aviv.” 

In many ways the attitude is similar to that of Britain during the German bombing raids of World War II. Life has to go on. But that does not mean you ignore your welfare altogether. Usually.

“You normally have 15-30 seconds to run to a shelter when the sirens go off,” Carver notes.  “Or in my apartment building, you go to the stairwell. This morning I was sleeping and the sirens sounded. I woke up my roommate and we ran to the stairwell. We waited for the crash. And then I cycled to work. Life as usual.”

Away from the hubbub of Tel Aviv and the Israeli-Palestinian conflicts

Away from the hubbub of Tel Aviv and the Israeli-Palestinian conflicts

Open lanes

At one point in mid-July 2014, the rockets aimed at Tel Aviv got through the Iron Dome when Cid Carver and her fellow triathletes were outside training at a downtown pool.

“I must admit, being in the swimming pool while the sirens go off and watching the Iron Dome hit a missile is very surreal.I was just about to get in the pool, I was filling up my water bottle and I heard the sirens. People stopped, and I was looking at the life guards and my friends who were in the pool and everyone just, basically stayed put as we waited for the explosion. I turned to my friend (an Israeli who recently did Ironman Austria) who gave me a hug then started laughing and said, “Perfect, look the lanes are empty, yalla! We heard the explosion and saw the smoke. Then we dove into the pool and continued the workout. There was nothing else we could really do about it. I was here in 2012 during Pillar of Defense and so this is the second time I have heard the sirens. So I am more used to it, but your heart sinks.”

When asked what she meant by her heart sinking, she says simply, “Fear.”

Finding family

Carver's social life is centered around triathlons and moves out from there

Carver’s social life is centered around triathlons and moves out from there

The triathlon community is Cid’s family in Israel. “I met a women who moved to Israel 30 years ago and she became my adopted mom. We went to Amsterdam to do the marathon together, I call her my Ironmom. When I moved here I knew no one. I wasn’t a triathlete or anything, just trying to find my way and slowly, as I ran my first race then signed up for my first triathlon I made friends. Friends that are also now family. I don’t go to the bars, I call my friends to swim or run or bike. And that is way better.”

She also recently met an Israeli man with whom she shares other activities. “He surfs and asked me to help him run a 5km in 25 minutes and we rock climb together. He is the first guy I’ve met who is not intimidated by me. That is one of the tough parts about being a determined female athlete,” she laughs. “He has his stuff and I have mine and then we have our stuff. But we’re always staying active.”

Recovering from loss

Cid Carver is finding her way in the world after the loss of her mother to suicide. “I got into sports as a kind of therapy,” she says. “It is a way to keep yourself moving forward, connected and happy.”

Her goals and training include plenty of movement, including a three day bike ride from one end of Israel to the other, 180km a day. “That gives you an idea of how small Israel really is. That you can cycle the entire length of the country in three days. All the cycling teams do it each year.”

Long cycling events can start in the forested mountains of Israel and wind through rocky deserts

Long cycling events can start in the forested mountains of Israel and wind through rocky deserts

She will also participate in a cycling event called the Dead Sea Gran Fondo. “You start at the lowest point on earth and ride UP!” she laughs. 

The country also sports a running relay event covering 220 kilometers. “Tell all your running friends to come!” she urges. “It’s a great event.”

Sports marketing

Which brings Cid Carver to the other reason in her love of sports: She longs to market Israel to the world. “I’m going to take an intensive 2-month Hebrew course and work part time, and then hopefully build up my base to work in marketing with one of the races or organizations. My dream though is to showcase Israel to the world in a positive light through sports!”

Not everything in life needs to be serious

Not everything in life needs to be serious

The contrast between daily life in the nation beset by rocket bombardment and her hope of bringing the world to Israel through sports is not lost on her. Her take: “Sports is the only place where language and religion don’t matter.”

While that might be something of a blanket statement, and a bit innocent perhaps, the point is well taken when looking at events like the recent World Cup soccer tournament, where Iran’s football team carried the hopes of a nation that has been targeted by economic sanctions and ostracized by the world for its political philosophies.  

Carver knows she cannot necessarily solve all that. But she sees hope in the personal connections made through sports. “I have met some amazing Arab cyclists and swimmers and it doesn’t matter where we come from. We are all racing and training together,” she says. “Sports is community building, and the races are like summer camp. It’s the time to reconnect with friends and do what you love. Everyone.”

To give perspective on what it’s like to train and race in an entirely new environment, especially one as recognized and perhaps infamously documented as Israel, I asked Cid Carver to answer a series of questions about her training and racing: 

Are there special obstacles to being a woman/female athlete in Israel? 

The number of women athletes in triathlons in Israel is on the increase

The number of women athletes in triathlons in Israel is on the increase

While I don’t say or think there are any obstacles to being a female athlete, it’s more that I wish I saw more females participating in the sports and on more of a competitive level. In May, I participated in a relay race that was 220KM from the northern most border, running south, all over road. I was on a team of six and we were all women. We were all very competitive women who have all moved to Israel and we met here. And of course we wanted to aim for the podium, personal records and making it through the night without sleep. The added bonus was the navigation in the cars, so there we were, six women, driving two cars, running off road and navigating in a foreign language and when we won were quite pleased! And we were the only all female team to have entered the race out of 7,000 people.

In the triathlons, there are even less. In the half Ironman distance race in Elat, out of the 1,500+ participates there were only two women entered in the half distance from ages 18 – 29, myself and a good friend. And for the sprint and Olympic distances in my age category (25 – 29), it’s a good day if there are ten of us. We’re starting to see more girls in the kids and teens, which is awesome! And lots of women in the 35+ categories, but slowly this is changing.

What are your racing goals and event planning for 2014? 

Competing fulfills Carver as it builds her friend network

Competing fulfills Carver as it builds her friend network

Race goals and event planning is my favorite part of the sport. My biggest goal is to improve my 5km, 10km and 21.5km times in triathlons. I am focusing on and doing all sprint triathlons for the year to reach my other goal of being #1 in my age category here. I’ve already completed 4 races with 1st and 2nds, the season just ended and we will resume in September thru November. November I will do one Olympic, the last race of the season and then for the third year in a row, I’ll do the 1/2 Israman (half ironman distance race) in Elat, Israel. Where there my goal is to beat last years time.

There are of course some fun events along the way, such as two off road races I’ll run in, a 3 day bike ride from the north border to the south and maybe some time trial events in the fall for cycling, but the big goals are above. I am planning at the moment to do my first ironman in November 2015. It’s like a drug, the more you do the more you want to do and to see how far you can go.

Is there a community of athletes with whom you train or do you do a lot solo? 

Doing the triathlons and sports was my way to integrate into Israeli culture since I didn’t study here, I didn’t grow up with the language and I didn’t do the army, so I needed a way to make friends. I am on cycling team, they are a non-competitive oriented team, but it’s all what you make of it and I love the group. I swim a lot with friends who I met at the pool or in the sea with friends who I’ve met at races. And then running with friends, we have our own small group or I’ll run after my cycling practice up to 6km with guys from the group. It’s more of my social life than training, at least that’s how I feel. 

I like to feel that I’m not stuck or to rigid, it’s more enjoyable to ride with friends as well. This is what we do in our free time, we all still have jobs, so it’s important to love it and the people who you surround yourself with in trainings to get the good vibes.

If you were to prepare someone else to come to the Middle East as an athlete, what would you tell them? 

LIfe in the Middle East is colorful, fascinating and sometimes dangerous

LIfe in the Middle East is colorful, fascinating and sometimes dangerous

The Middle East is quite a large region, but I can give some tips for traveling to Israel as an athlete. First, it totally depends when you arrive here, but the weather. The summer is hot, humid and nearly miserable. You have to start at 6AM, otherwise you’ll melt. The winter, well it snowed this year in Jerusalem, so it also can be quite chilly. But, like any adventure, check the seasons and the norm and prepare accordingly.

As far as culture and race atmosphere of the races. From what I’ve heard, it’s a little less organized and everything has a large personality but in a smaller venue, lots of life and energy, but not so shiny and fancy or showy. It’s a great environment and much more laid back. Don’t expect to be pampered here. 

Also, in terms of triathlons, from what friends have said, there are less mile (KM) mile markers. And in the water or swim section, and I thought this was standard since I have not done a triathlon abroad yet, there are usually 2 guys in the water, one on a paddle board and one in a kayak, or sometimes a jet ski. There are sometimes helpers near the finish of the swim to help you up if it’s wavy. There are less signs directing you where to go and the people at the corners usually won’t be guiding you, you just have to be aware of where to go, look at the map before and follow the people in front of you, prepare.

What is your background leading up to moving overseas? HS? College athlete?

Clearly Cid Carver was head over heels about show jumping

Clearly Cid Carver was head over heels about show jumping

I actually rode horses competitively, show jumping in high school and in my senior year of college I ran on the cross country team, but the longest I ever ran was a 10K until I did my first half marathon in March 2012. I went to the gym a few days a week and would do the stair master, pretend to lift some weights and swam occasionally, but I was never serious about sports. Until I bought my road bike in June 2012, I’m actually not even sure the last time I had ridden a bike, except beach cruisers here and there on vacations.

What attracted you to triathlon/running/biking & swimming. 

When I first moved to Israel I was working to get my citizenship and I needed something to do and training for a 1/2 marathon was something I’d always talked about, so I signed up and started training. I met some friends along the way, did it and loved it. But running was boring for me, so I started investigating other options. The only other race I found advertised in English here, was the 1/2 Israman ironman distance race. So I bought a second hand, alumnium road bike, a pass to the pool, signed up and was hooked.

How does the medical/fitness advisory community operate where you are? 

The fitness community is pretty great and organized.This is not something I’ve thought much about. We have medical insurance for all of the events / races for sports injuries, and the doctors are good. Our health care is public, and everyone has medical help if they need. 

There is I believe a sports/ fitness committee, but on the national level or government level I am not familiar with it.

What are some of the greatest attributes of where you live, outside of fitness, etc? Favorite places or new discoveries.

A prior trip to Machu Picchu whetted Carver's interest in the world

A prior trip to Machu Picchu whetted Carver’s interest in the world

First, the people. I love the culture here. Everyone is crazy friendly and open and willing to help you or say hi or to train. I have met some great friends sitting at cafes, or in my regular bike loop in the morning or at races. It’s a small community of cyclists and triathletes, so you see a lot of familiar faces and become friends or training partners, so I like that closeness and willing to help your neighbor attitude. Honestly though, the culture and people are open and treat you like family, everyone is like family.

Saturday is Shabbat and there is no public transportation in the country and nothing is open, so at 6am – 10am it’s super quiet and perfect for bikers!

Carver plans to work in sports marketing someday

Carver plans to work in sports marketing someday

Work is awesome. I’m at a start up and we are pretty relaxed but also extremely serious, it’s a nice balance and I find that people are more human, and connected to one another. I moved to country where i didn’t know a single person or the language and now can’t imagine my life anywhere else.

But, I like paddle boarding on the weekends or scuba diving in the south in the red Sea. There is amazing marine life here. Nature and hiking are incredible attributes as well. Some of the trails are breath taking. When I’m not training, I’m planning hiking trips.

Also, there is always something to do. Always an event, concert, volunteer project, so I love just taking part in what is thrown my way.

And the weather. Israel is really unique. We have the desert in the south, the entire coast is along the Mediterranean and then the north is hilly, green and lush and it will even snow in the winter. So you get to experience difference elements in a very tiny, compact space. It’s easy to get around, and takes no more than three hours to drive the width of the country, and no more than 8.5 hours to drive from north to south.

Has there been a big adaptation in diet and training for you? 

Life balance includes plenty of outdoor time and also good, healthy eating

Life balance includes plenty of outdoor time and also good, healthy eating

Everything. When I was in college at Suffolk, University I rarely cooked and was a college kid who lived off of quick meals and bar food. When I moved here, first everything is organic and the go-to food are fruits and vegetables or hummus. Not to be cliche, but I do love hummus and it does go with a lot. Generally I eat a lot of whole grain sandwiches, salads, home cooked meals from friends or sushi or at one of the vegan restaurants. Eating out here is also easier, most of the food is healthy, it’s organic and not processed. When I visit the states or Europe, I can feel the difference and how heavy food makes you abroad and that your choices are limited. Cookies are also a big part of my diet, I have a sweet tooth.

I also wanted to share with you the responses from two of my friends. 

The first is from my friend Aviva, who said switching from miles to kilometers has been rough. And she mainly mentions the conversion centers and the booths, that in the states it is more of a spectacle and here, well, not as big, not yet that is.

And from my friend Elyssa: “I think the biggest adaptation for me was finding the places to train. It’s much more widely available in the states, because more people are doing it. For me also, it was dealing with a different schedule and not having as much control over my free time, but that’s personal I think  more so that something that is specifically different from Israel to the us. In Addition, in Israel there are not as many people on the courses directing you, and in the state’s you will see people scuba diving and a life guard every 2 feet, here you might see only 2 life guards, not bad, just different and a bit more free and like a scavenger hunt to figure out the course.”

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Racing the first criterium of summer reveals the inner mind

By Christopher Cudworth

FroomewigginsThere’s a funny thing about cycling, especially competitive cycling, that no one really likes to admit. When you’re in a race there is really no time to look up.

Just ask Chris Froome, the 2013 Tour de France champion who crashed three times in two days and wound up looking like a wind-whipped scarecrow along the side of the road. He hadn’t even reached the cobble sections of Stage 5. Talk was rampant about his team’s choice to leave ex-champion Bradley Wiggins back home. It just goes to prove that while it always pays to look ahead on the bike, it’s also the stuff behind that can come back to haunt you.

Those of us who ride appreciate the challenges of staying upright in competitive situations. That first crash sent Froome to the deck without ceremony. It is unlikely it was his fault. Just a touch of a wheel and down you go.

Pileups

It can happen anytime. I’ve witnessed 8 or 10 riders piling into each other on a group ride when someone up front hits the brakes. Crunch. Clickety click. The sounds of spokes tangling. People cussing. A few hit the pavement. Then everyone gets back up, checks the equipment and rolls on.

Sure, in competitive running races people sometimes fall. But not nearly so often cyclists go down. Usually not so violently either. I ran steeplechase in college and saw a couple “wrecks” over time, but not as many as you’d think.

None of this went through my mind before racing my bike last night. We cyclists are a little bit crazy that way. While it might take a month or 6 months or a year from a marathoner to forget how much the last race hurt and want to run 26.2 miles again, a cyclist can crash and get road rash and have a sore ass for weeks and still get back on their bike because they miss riding.

I was leading a running road race one time when the lead cop car hit the brakes at an intersection. At 5:00 pace I was floating along too fast to stop and wound up bent over the back of the vehicle. “What the fuck?” I yelled. The cop just shrugged and drove on. I swallowed the adrenaline and ran on.

No worries

Our racing experience tells us things like that can happen. But standing on the line with other CAT 5 cyclists I was so relaxed it was like riding to the grocery story. A newbie rider in similarly modest kit attire, not team stuff, rolled up next to me. “What do we do in these races?” he asked.

This was my first race back in two years. I knew the answer. “Draft,” I told him. “Don’t break the wind for yourself at all costs. It all comes down to the last two laps anyway.”

Then the whistle blew and we rolled off for 8 laps on the Pelladrome, the rounded-corner rectangular industrial road where the Athletes By Design club hosts weekly practice crits.

Shiny bits

During warmups I noticed a large patch of glimmering glass bits on the back straightway. I made a mental note not to swing out too wide there. Not just because of the glass, but because the wind would eat you up anyway.

For 6 laps I held my own. Then we caught the warmup group of the CAT 1-3 riders and the CAT 5 race got split. Some took the inside (smart) route while 5 of us rode around the outside. By the time we caught back on we’d used valuable energy.

On several laps the wind was circulating so strangely through the group that the bike was whipping back and forth. Not out of control, but out of reaction to turbulence. We hit a top speed of 29 and averaged 23 for the race. Not terribly fast. But not bad for a windy night on the Pelladrome.

Then came lap seven and the hard break on the front stretch. Switching into even higher cadence I tried to jump from the second group to the 4 riders pulling away. I got within 10 meters before they hit the backstretch and the wind seemed to suck the juice out of my quads. I held that space for a bit and then lost them into the hard wind corner. Two other riders came by me with the wind. I kept my head and waited for sanity to return to my thighs. Then I notched it up to 22 again and caught the two stinkers that had passed me up, finishing about 40 yards back of the front sprint. 5th place in the first race of the season. I’ll take it.

My starting line friend came rolling up in warmdowns. “Nice job. I thought I left you behind.”

Crazy needs

Nope. There is still some fight in me. Still some crazy need to test the legs against other riders. Then I realized. I had hardly looked up during the entire race. Just kept my eyes on the wheels and riders in front and beside me, and rode with that inner dialogue that comes with racing. We live in a tiny world in those moments. By necessity. By choice. By excitement at being involved in this little competitive environment we create.

Then came a 40 minute cooldown watching the CAT 1 and 2 group whale away on each other. The whir of their tires pulled me in. I rode faster and faster as the cooldown proceeded. The inner mind works in strange ways when riding bikes. What’s cool is hot, and what’s hot is cool.

And then alongside me the noise of a tire going flat burst forth like a piston in a machine. A rather heavy rider in an all-black kit had ridden over the glass zone without looking down. His expression was priceless. That awful feeling of a flat under your wheel. At least his race was over.

That’s bike racing for you. Just ask Chris Froome.

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In the race against space junk, we’re all destined to lose

By Christopher Cudworth

You all know I keep a close eye out for your running and riding welfare. This blog has taught you about the dangers of tarsnakes and cosmic bike wobble, and how to avoid being eaten by an invasion of polar bears. Well today’s We Run and Ride is going to cover another threat to your earthly well-being. Yes, we’re going to engage in a serious discussion about space junk.

In case you have not heard, the earth is now basically encased in a speeding ring of space junk circling the planet at breakneck speed. 17,000 miles per hour to be exact. And you might think we’re safe down here, but that’s because you are not old enough to recall the falling of Skylab, which was described this way back in 1979:

“With varying degrees of fear, anger and fascination, but mostly with a detached kind of bemusement, the world this week awaits an unprecedented event: the fiery fall of the largest machine man has ever hurled into space. The American Sky lab vehicle, nine stories tall and weighing 77.5 tons, is expected to slip into the earth’s upper atmosphere, then disintegrate into a celestial shower of flaming metal as spectacular as any of last week’s Fourth of July fireworks displays. Somewhere, probably at sea, ten fragments, each weighing 1,000 Ibs. or more, will crash to earth at speeds of up to 270 m.p.h. with the force of a dying meteor. Thus will be observed, after a series of miscalculations, the tenth anniversary of man’s proudest achievement in space, the walk on the moon.”

That is some serious space junk.

It’s no exaggeration. We must account for the crap we’ve launched into space. Most of it is caught in a permanent orbit around the earth. Our planet may soon have visible rings the likes of Saturn. The Chicago Tribune published this report on July 9, 2014: ” Right now, millions of objects are whizzing around earth faster than speeding bullets. Much of this is celestial garbage––remnants of past missions and cosmic collision that have taken place over half a century.”

So let’s be honest. This is scary stuff. And it’s not made up. If the current pace of space junk keeps up, we’ll be trapped here on earth. And that’s a bad thing because if our current pace of pollution and global warming continue, we’re pretty much going to want to leave this place behind. There will be no more running and riding and swimming when the roads melt and the seas rise.

But we won’t be able to leave this planet if the razor sharp, speeding garbage now orbiting the earth threatens to take out our rocket ships. So what are we going to do about it? We’re going to spend $914.7M to set up a surveillance system that will provide a continuous view of what’s up there. A Space Fence.

Of course we already have a surveillance system for all the junk down here on the earth. It’s called the Internet, which makes it easy to find all the Stupid Shit said by people like Sarah Palin and Michelle Bachmann, both of whom appear to be Fembots from the planet Shitfest. The things that come out of their mouths go into orbit on the Internet and have been known to take down intelligent people through collision with their brain cells.

But the worst offender is Fox News, which daily sends a newsfeed of spaced out junk with a partisan bent so obvious it’s like an used-up Gemini capsule hurtling toward your noggin. Yet there are still people who nod and say, “Gee, I didn’t see that coming. Thanks for telling me.”

82-gravity-fetalBut Fox News is very successful, which just goes to show you can’t hope to outrun or outride space junk of any kind.

In fact if you saw the movie Gravity starring Whatsherbutt Bullock floating around a space lab in tiny black shorts, you know that getting hit by space debris is no small risk. It tears up your gizmos and your doohickeys, leaving you in the confines of a space cabin wearing little more than you might normally sport on a 5K run.

She’s lucky she wasn’t entirely naked under that space suit or we’d have seen clear up her orifices as if she was a sea anemone. That’s how Hollywood likes its female stars to approach moviemaking anyway.

The clouds of space debris that hit her ship are circling the earth at speeds  faster than the sprinters in the Tour de France. And there’s so much space junk up there that currently every launch of a space-bound satellite or other flying object must be timed to avoid being obliterated by the minefield of orbiting degree.

Perhaps you did not know all this? Perhaps you also did not know that President Ronald Reagan wandered around the White House for nearly three years with his hands happily flapping at his sides while his minions actually ran the country because his brain was fried from the early stages of Alzheimers? Or that LBJ was a politically savvy and mean sonofabitch who might well have had a hand in killing JFK?

There’s a lot of things we still don’t know about life and the universe. But at least you now know that we’re also really fucking up Outer Space while we cook like frogs in our own atmosphere down below. There are chunks of Chinese satellites from when they blasted their own equipment to pieces, and some defunct Russian satellite crashed into a functioning US satellite throwing 2,000 scraps of space trash into 17,000 mph orbit as well.

And so it goes. While down here on earth we run and ride in similar fashion. Why, just a few weeks ago I crashed into a downed tree and nearly exploded myself into a thousand pieces. I even left a chunk of my chin on that tree.

It makes one wonder whether we’re all just space junk of one kind or another. Just random bits of carbon with a brain driving us around. We run and ride as fast as we can and sooner or later we run into shit or crash on the ground like Chris Froome in the 2014 Tour de France.

You’ll recall that all this started way back in the 1950s with the Space Race between the Soviet Union and the United States. And despite all our advances in technology since then, we keep pumping crap into the atmosphere and beyond like there’s no tomorrow. But rest assured, they’ve got us covered. “Our system will do precision tracking,” says Steve Bruce of Lockheed, inventors of all things that go zoom and boom, “That’s what makes it so good.”

Just what we need. A really precise way to tell us that we’ve fucked up the immediate universe. That’s like a running or cycling coach telling us, “Hey, go right through that forest over here and never mind the trees.”

Genius. Aren’t we?

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You can’t worry your way to success

With anti-worry hints added

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By Christopher Cudworth

Getting to the finish requires us to dispense with worry. Getting to the finish requires us to dispense with worry.

Insecurity is not the friend of any endurance athlete. When we’re fit we worry that we’re not fit enough. When we’re unfit we worry if we can get fit in time for the next big events. When we’re somewhere in between we worry that the events in which we’ve chosen to participate are a bit too challenging. Our goals make us worry. Expectations too.

All those worries, and for what? Pretty much all we can actually do is take the fitness we have and apply it the best we can. That’s true in running, cycling or triathlon. You can’t worry your way to wonderful performances.

I learned that lesson years ago during the runup to the Prairie State Games, a quasi-Olympic event held in the state of Illinois.

I’d qualified easily in the 5000 meters event by winning…

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You can’t worry your way to success

By Christopher Cudworth

Getting to the finish requires us to dispense with worry.

Getting to the finish requires us to dispense with worry.

Insecurity is not the friend of any endurance athlete. When we’re fit we worry that we’re not fit enough. When we’re unfit we worry if we can get fit in time for the next big events. When we’re somewhere in between we worry that the events in which we’ve chosen to participate are a bit too challenging. Our goals make us worry. Expectations too.

All those worries, and for what? Pretty much all we can actually do is take the fitness we have and apply it the best we can. That’s true in running, cycling or triathlon. You can’t worry your way to wonderful performances.

I learned that lesson years ago during the runup to the Prairie State Games, a quasi-Olympic event held in the state of Illinois.

I’d qualified easily in the 5000 meters event by winning the regional competition at 15:30 on a hot day on the York High School track.

Our team coaches Joe Newton of York High School and Al Carius of North Central College both had already sealed their reputations as two of the leading distance coaches in the nation. Newton’s cross country teams have won dozens of state titles and Carius was literally named Coach of the Century by the NCAA.

But coaching a team confabbed from random qualifiers is not exactly easy. There were no team practices by which to advise the distance runners on their training or racing strategies. You just showed up downstate at the University of Illinois and did your thing.

And that did not go so well in my case. I was extremely fit. That wasn’t the problem. I ran the first two miles of the 5000 meter competition in 9:28. Then things went south with a sidestitch and heat prostration in the 85 degree heat and 80% humidity. Between the bad temps and drinking too many Cokes in the days leading up to the race the ability to finish was just wiped out.

But worry was a problem too. I’d done too much perambulating about my chances for a medal, or even winning the race.

Standing next to me on the line was a University of Illinois athlete named Ty Wolf. His best time was down around 14:00. My best was 14:47. On the other side of me stood a guy named Paul Snyder (if I recall his name correctly.) He wore a University of Chicago Track Club shirt. We’d talked a bit during warmups and I was struck by how nice a guy he really was. His best time was around 14:30. But I still wanted to beat him.

Wolf swung into a 20-second lead by two miles and Snyder had snagged second, looking comfortable. I was running well in third until that sidestitch hit. It felt as if a hot knife were dragging from my ribs to my waist. I ran half a lap bent over and then got pulled out of the competition by the medics. They sat me in a wheelbarrow full of ice. Within minutes I felt fine if a bit morose. I wanted a medal at the inaugural Prairie State Games. That was not going to happen now.

What really caused the meltdown was worry. I was worried that I might not win. It’s true. Frankly I overshot my true abilities with those aims. The tension caused by unrealistic (surrealistic?) goals added up to nervous behavior leading up to the competition and a race strategy that was more frantic than calculated.

It was a good lesson to learn. If you’re truly going to achieve beyond your abilities it is relaxation and intelligent preparation that will make it happen. Not worry. Fortunately I lived to tell those tales on other days. I actually learned from the worrisome experience of the Prairie State Games.

Of course I’m not the only athlete who’s had to learn the worry lesson the hard way. Dozens of world class athletes with world records under their belts have gone to the Olympics and fallen short of their dreams. I’m willing to bet that worry played a part in every one of those downfalls.

Because whether you’re an Olympian or a quasi-Olympian, it doesn’t pay to worry yourself into a fit.

Strip away the worry and what do you find underneath? The naked truth about your fitness and what to do with it.

As you prepare for your next competition, here’s how to strip away the worry and get to the naked truth about your ambitions:

1. Review your training and identify ways it has prepared you for success

2. Break down your overall goal into achievable parts such as splits and pace

3. Think beyond the event to give yourself perspective: life will go on

4. Discuss your goals and pace with a coach or trusted friend to gain confidence

5. Forgive yourself any shortcomings and compliment yourself for hard work.

It’s as simple as that. Getting rid of worry is all about focusing on the positives and the real work you’ve done to prepare.

Go out and compete. It’s the best you can do. Worrying about it won’t help one bit.

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A liberating look at running and riding after the 4th of July

By Christopher Cudworth

IMG_0387Some mindsets are extremely powerful. At times we can base our lives on old habits and attitudes that don’t add up to common sense or reality.

One of those mindsets has plagued me for years, and it’s time to be free of it.

Here’s how it worked.

Back in high school and college it was common to run some summer miles in preparation for cross country season in fall. Practice usually began in early t0 mid August. So there was always a Back To School component to summer training.

Of course if you didn’t suck at your sport, the track season did not end until late May or early June. That meant the 21 days between the end of May and the true beginning of summer around the 20th of June was a decompression period. You did not race. You trained easy.

It seems silly to think that a mindset built that long ago could rule your brain 10, 20, even 40 years later. But it happens.

The dreaded turning point was 4th of July. Back to serious training. Start plugging away at the base miles in the heat of summer. One high school coach warned me that training through July was miserable but necessary preparation for the pending cross country season. So I dutifully tried as a fifteen year old sophomore to run during the summer months. But the shoes back then were almost useless in terms of padding and summer road training. So I often did not run. Not in the traditional sense of summer training anyway.

Constructs

Summer used to be focused solely toward fall cross country meets. It's a hard mindset to lose.

Summer used to be focused solely toward fall cross country meets. It’s a hard mindset to lose.

My high school teammates did. Some logged 500 to 1000 miles over the summer months. I always marveled at their focus and dedication. All through high school I typically blew off much summer distance training. I played basketball and baseball and tennis and golf and rode my bike for hours at a time. I had a paper route at 5:30 in the morning that involved 5 miles of cycling. Pretty much I was a perpetual motion machine.

And when cross country season came around I dove into fall training for 3 weeks and rounded into shape relatively quickly. As a freshman I made varsity and ran a sub 17:00 3-mile. As a sophomore I led the team in points, ran a 3-mile in the low 16:00s and helped lead the team to its first conference championship. As a junior I moved to a new school and was first runner for a team that won a district championship. As a senior I barely missed qualifying for the state meet in the most competitive sectional competition in Illinois.

But that whole summer training thing never registered well with me. Could I have been a better runner with more summer running? I’m not so sure. Typically most seasons wound up being a struggle against burnout. We had so many duals and triangulars and invitationals that by season’s end my body was running on fumes. I’m going to be radical and state that I think summer running is in some ways overrated for high school runners. Yes a small base is helpful to keep fitness up. But I did that on my own. It wasn’t necessary to be chased by farms dogs to get me to run. And that’s pretty much what happened back then.

Of course now most high school programs have a much more communal approach to summer running. Athletes get together for morning runs and support each other. It did not help that the first two years of high school were associated with a school district covering the largest geographic territory in the state. Teammates were scattered around 6 different towns feeding into the district. Summer training together? It wasn’t going to happen.

It was my lazy-assed fault, however, that I did not immediately join the summer track club in St. Charles when I moved there. But baseball was my summer sport. I was 7-1 as a pitcher. No regrets there.

College psychology

HantsbargerCudworthEven in college the summer psychology was a bit twisted toward pressure rather than joy in summer running. By the time I was a senior I had it down a little better but again, we started hard training in early August and did not finish until November. There was 13 meets in between. 80-90 miles were common.

Upon graduation the whole schedule finally started to shift. Summer road race season was where the action happened. And at the age of 24 I raced 24 times and won 12 of those races. I learned to train hard through summer heat and race in June, July and August rather than confining those efforts to spring and fall.

And of course now that cycling is a big part of life, the summer months are treasured for their calmer, less windy days. Long rides in the heat of summer can be taxing, but you live for that.

Old habits die hard

That should have cured my scholastic dread about the summer months. But not completely.

Now I’m more than 50 years old and still running and riding. This weekend my plan is to compete in a hilly criterium bike racing even. In a few weeks there may come a duathlon and then a team triathlon.

Yet that feeling of falling off a shelf of sorts after the 4th of July still holds. And it’s ridiculous. That old habit of mind needs to be discarded. It’s an Independence Day of a different sort. There are two whole months of summer to be enjoyed. Running. Riding. Testing the limits.

And come fall the fitness can be put to use all the way through October.

Yes, it’s a Happy 4th when you finally decided to liberate yourself to look ahead without the burden of some old scholastic mindset coloring the season. It almost makes you wonder about other old mindsets that might be holding you back somehow. Doesn’t it?

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Taking a decent look at cycling and running indecency

By Christopher Cudworth

While signing up for the Winfield Criterium I chanced to view this warning:

DECENCY: Please respect residents and families when changing for your event. Riders breaking indecency laws (i.e. nudity) will be disqualified, ticketed and possibly arrested.

That’s not an unreasonable request. There is nothing quite so offensive as the bare, pale backside of a cyclist highlighted in the afternoon sun. Especially when the tan lines above and below that backside essentially frame said white skin with jarring emphasis.

And yet, we get to the race and find ourselves struggling to find a place to change a kit. Or, some people just don’t care.

The people in the first category simply need to learn to cover themselves inside their vehicle and change clothes. It’s not that hard.

The second category, cyclists and runners who just don’t care if anyone sees them naked in public, really do need to be punished.

It’s so easy to ruin an event for the rest of us by being a rude jerk or a rube jerk. The two are quite commonly one and the same.

Imagine standing in your front yard at a home along a bike course with your two daughters, ages six and two. Suddenly this bare scary guy emerges from behind an SUV with his naked nard and the two kids are permanently scarred for life.

One must imagine the typical nudification among cyclists and runners at events is primarily a male thing. Yes I know some great ladies who don’t care that much if you see them in the buff. But they’re usually classy enough not to show their goods to the greater neighborhood.

Because it’s one thing for fellow athletes to look up and see the goods. It’s quite another for innocent people in their homes and businesses to be shocked into submission by hairy or hairless body shapes.

Even fans get into the action at the Naked Bike Ride. Which is pretty decent of them. Just saying.

Even fans get into the action at the Naked Bike Ride. Which is pretty decent of them. Just saying.

That is not to say we should not support the manically fun event called The Naked Bike Ride. That’s a totally different approach to nakedness. People know what they’re getting with The Naked Bike Ride.

So use some class this summer, runners and riders. Discretion really is the better part of valor.

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A firecracker of a 4-mile race

By Christopher Cudworth

When you set off a chain of fireworks there is that moment before the first one pops where the tension is high, The smoke is rising and a small sparky flame inches toward the main fuse.

Then poppity popp crack popp! Off they all go in succession.

Sure they’re illegal in many states. But firecrackers sure are fun. They provide some type of relief from our mundane existences. That’s why some people like to explode really big fireworks. It is the catharsis of summer malaise.

The same can be said of any race you run. There are those moments before the race starts where everything is buzzing around the finish line. You’ve sized up your competitors and the gun has yet to go off. You hope in place. Try to keep warmed up.

Then POW the gun fires and everyone swings into action.

On a hot July day during my early 20s the Firecracker 4-Mile presented just such a scene. I was in the shape of my life, having just run a 31:10 10K the prior week in an event where our racing team took 8 out of the top 10 spots in a local road race.

None of my teammates signed up for the Firecracker 4-Mile. Most had other plans for the 4th of July. So I took it on myself to invade the turf of one of the most prolific running communities in the Chicago suburbs. That was the city of Glen Ellyn.

Ken Popejoy was a Michigan State grad and top ranked miler through the early 80s.

Ken Popejoy (center) was a Michigan State grad and top ranked miler through the early 80s.

It’s most famous athlete was Ken Popejoy, a sub-4 miler and ruler of all things road and track in the region in those days. But Ken was not racing the Firecracker 4, and for that I was glad.

But another fine runner stood on the line next to me that morning. His name was Geoff as I recall, and he was winning things right and left on the road circuit that summer.

So I knew the race would be difficult. And fast. Plus the terrain of Glen Ellyn was really hilly.

Still I set my sights on 5:00 pace just the same.

And for the first mile we raced along at 5:00 pace. And the second. And the third. I finally tried to surge away from Geoff at the start of the third mile. A knot of his supporters was at the top of a hill and they shouted to him, “Don’t let him go here! Don’t let him go!”

And Geoff surged back. Right on my shoulder. With a half mile to go he took back the lead and it was my turn to hang on. That’s all I could do. The hills and the pace and the heat all kept me in second that day. And a slightly superior runner. He ran 19:59 and I finished in 20:00.

We shook hands and that was that. Memories were made and bling was handed out. My girlfriend and I gathered up my stuff and headed home to set off fireworks, drink beer and wait for the evening’s big display in her hometown.

I was disappointed to lose in the last mile but had not given in easy. It would have been hard to find even a step that might have been changed in the effort. Even when things go almost perfect, it’s always possible that someone else is just that much fitter, a touch more motivated or scared to lose on their home turf.

It’s all about competition. And it’s a joy, for sure.

And that is the principle upon which America is founded. So let’s celebrate it. Have fun with those firecrackers. Be safe and enjoy the 4th if you’re here stateside. To the rest of the world, your Independence Day is always what you make it. Run on. Ride on. See you on the roads.

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