Following Sue’s bike accident in July 2013, she was initially not able to swim due to a torn rotator cuff. When the Naperville Sprint Triathlon rolled around in August, she reached out to a Master’s Swim buddy named Lida to handle the first leg of our proposed Sprint Triathlon Relay team. Lida would swim, Sue would bike, and I’d do the run portion.

Triathlon is not a sport for the sleepyheads of the world. We met up at the race that morning before the sun came up. I was a little nervous about racing because I’d taken a few years off from competition during my late wife’s struggles with cancer. For one thing, there wasn’t much time to train. For another, I had enough PTSD from the stress of caregiving for both my wife and stroke-ridden father that any additional stress felt like a huge, unmanageable burden. By the end of summer 2013, I was finally feeling like I could take on some new challenges. Following a summer of running and riding with Sue, I felt decently fit. We signed up as a team and figured to do decently because Lida was a superb swimmer, a former Division 1 competitor. Sue was a strong cyclist, and I was hoping to run 7:00 pace for the 5K. We did earn a win that day!

The swim in a Sprint Triathlon is a short affair, barely 400 meters. In Naperville, the course begins with the large, open water swimming area with a sand bottom. But without room for 400 straight yards of swimming, the course takes a series of bends and turnarounds. Lida tore through that swim in six minutes or so, handed the chip timer to Sue for the bike, and gave a big smile. “So,” she asked. “What do you think about Sue?”

I sensed Lida’s honesty right away, so I told her about my late wife’s long cancer survivorship journey and how I met Sue through FitnessSingles.com. Lida worked as a case manager in healthcare at the time. She absolutely understood my life transitions. We bonded over that, and before Sue returned from the bike course, I’d hopefully passed the girlfriend test.

That day set Lida on a course of her own in triathlon. Until then, she had not ridden a bike, much less run the miles necessary to train for a triathlon. That changed fast. I recall her first early rides on the bike. She was unsure about longer rides and was not all that efficient initially. Again, that changed fast. Her Division 1 “engine” quickly converted to endurance and speed on the bike. She bought a tri-bike and joined us on training rides of 60-70 miles in Illinois and Wisconsin. Lida and Sue maintained their girlfriend relationship through it all, and Lida soon completed her first full Ironman. Last year she competed in the World Triathlon Championships in Finland.

It’s easy to take for granted the impressions people make on your life. I’ll confess to some jealousy as Lida tore through the layers of triathlon on her way to winning age-group awards and finishing a full Ironman. I took it much more slowly, doing a few duathlons first, then some Sprint triathlons before tackling an Olympic distance tri in Pleasant Prairie. The swim section and Open Water fears held me back. Lida had none of those fears given her swim skills.

The run was harder for Lida, but she became a steady, solid athlete there too. And then, a charming thing took place along the way. Her daughter Stephanie joined her mom in the sport of triathlon, and became an Ironman finisher as well. Their entire family is athletic. One of their sons played football at Illinois State and Lida’s husband John was a basketball guard on a Division III National Championship team at North Park.

Every year the family held a big backyard Oktoberfest event that Sue and I attended. Dozens of people showed up from near and far. Somehow a group of Swedes or Germans (I can’t remember which) that knew the family showed up to keep the Beer Garden busy. Typically, we’d find fair fall weather that tipped into the cool evening where we’d gather in lawn chairs around small bonfires to keep our feet warm. I snapped this photo of Sue and Lida one sunny September afternoon.

I relate all this to express the importance of friends in life. While we all love competing, having people you can trust in life is important. We’re grateful for people like Lida, a person who can tell it straight. I think I can still pass the Girlfriend Test, but maybe I’ll ask her next time.